The BOB Blog

JANUARY RANDOMNESS

2012-01-26T15:20:00.000-06:00

I feel the Christmas letter posting below was a failure. Or it stank. Or was too long. Versus the number of comments I used to get to the printed version, this idea was a bust. Maybe people are just too busy to click a link and read, I don't know. I got some response, but not what I am used to. Unsure what to do next year.

Show off! Show ON.

I was listening to myself from 40 years ago yesterday. Someone had posted something on Facebook which reminded me that airchecks from my days as a disc jockey are still online. Listening back to this raw kid on the radio in Pittsburgh - then a top 10 market - with what I know NOW about how to entertain and do great radio, the best opinion I can muster is: "interesting." Whatever it was, it WAS NOT the sterile crap that airs on many stations today. That's somewhat in part due to cost-cutting measures where a person on-air in today's radio can dial up the future in the computer, and drop what he's going to say where it fits. There's no SHARED experience. That is, the person you hear didn't just hear what you heard. How's that cut costs? Because the person you hear is doing this for multiple stations in several cities, reducing staff. And payroll. An example: a show that would have paid $35,000/yr now pays about $5,000 to the "voice-tracker.".

THE SECRET

If you listen to a radio station with a "call-in to win" contest, you stand a much better chance by using your cell phone to make the call.

CHRISTMAS 2011

2011-12-20T10:16:00.000-06:00

The Truth about Christmas

There's a theory that everything influences everything else. You know: When a butterfly dies, a war breaks out somewhere. Or for every bell-ring, an angel gets its wings. Something like that. The Hawaiians only use 13 letters of the 26 letter alphabet, and they get a volcano.

We decided not to send out Christmas cards this year, and instead, I will give the $$$ to charity (water.org) If everyone did this in the USA, we'd put, say, $10,000,000,000 into 'doing good.' (that's billion with a B, based on 100 cards at $.50ish, postage at $.45ish, and 100 million people not sending greeting cards.) Think of the good we could do. Great ideas start small.

But wait! As politicos quickly respond to any idea at all, jobs will be lost. And yes, jobs will be lost. Big Joey, the guy who stands over the steaming fumes at the vat of to-be-cards’ recycled paper, stirring the slurry of bleach and acid, will be gone. The doc who treats him for his lung condition will have one less patient. Frank, who oils the rollers that squeeze the last drops of old ink from the paper paste, he'll be gone too. Little Sally, his daughter, won't get the Little Buckaroo Pony Cardboard Corral she asked Santa to bring because dad will have fallen on hard times. She’ll still have to walk to school in her bark flip-flops. At the glitter factory, Bruce, the formerly-jovial manager, will call for a staff meeting. He'll shut down the big machines which turn old car sheet metal into glitter to help angels find their way through the Christmas clouds on so many cards, then to serve as reminders of fond greetings in carpets for months after the holidays. Hallmark will shut down its Christmas Card line; some workers will be moved to Sympathy, some to Graduation, some to Birthday, but, sadly, some artists, envelope glue inspectors, and folder-operators will be cast out into the harsh reality of Missouri. They'll hold onto their old beater SUVs a little longer, guzzling more gas through low efficiency, increasing demand, and raising prices at the pump for the rest of us.

And the postal service is already so deep in debt!

There are so many implications. The mind boggles. Plus, it's a dilemma – how to let those who don't get a Christmas card from us this year know that this Christmas "letter" – sort of a semi-popular tradition – is alive on the blog here?

We simply feel the almost-obligatory Christmas Card assembly line is too impersonal and only good for about 5 seconds of yearly contact, when we wish there could be a deeper connection. Having worked all over North America, not to mention the good work of the witness relocation program, there are trails of friends who, sadly, we don't ever see.

Heck, you don't even get to lick a stamp anymore.

Before their passing, the Mayans’ calendar implies that next year will be the last one anyway, so maybe we will only miss one yearly card, i.e.: 2011. The end of the world is scheduled for BEFORE Christmas 2012, and just before my birthday on the 23^rd. (Screwed again!) They apparently misplaced the asterisk signifying the end of their civilization but thoughtfully included their End Of The World Calendar *for the rest of us. *Like festivus.

Allow me to jump around in time as you read, since this piece is written in streams of consciousness over a span of months. At this point, I have just missed the nationwide emergency message test. I wanted to spin the dial to hear what was happening but I forgot – by only 8 minutes. Apparently some stations got Lady Gaga instead of the "tuck your butt" warning. Having worked in the biz, as they say, I can understand this. I also wanted to hear which stations had sold advertising into or out of the scary message. Pest or plague control services would be a natural, for one. Hearing Aids, for another.

This year, the administration has imposed a 15 cent or 15% (earliest reports vary) tax on Christmas trees. An image-management stupidity! And why is there an election next year if the world is ending? Shouldn't we all be running up massive debt we won’t ever repay? Oh, wait, that's happening.

Today is November 9th. Last evening, the big aircraft-carrier-sized meteor missed us. Today astronomers are going naa-naa-naa na naaaa naa! If the threat was real, Bruce Willis would have saved us. I just know it. Ronald Reagan ripped the fabric which held Hollywood and Real Life apart. Forever.

I whole-heartedly recommend the Steve Jobs biography. He was clearly a simultaneous asshole/jerk/genius. Quite a spectrum on that man. I read the book on the IPad2, which was really haunting. If they had made Siri (the voice assist on IPhone 4s) speak in his voice, it'd be REALLY spooky. So far Siri has mostly told me it can't connect to the network. Actually, Siri's gender wasn't assigned. Sounds like a female to me, but then you can't be sure. *Note: a guy on the interwebs says he was recorded for what became Siri, in 1996. Could be. You can’t tell.

Another big endorsement: Stephen King's 11/22/63 – a long yet extremely worthwhile read!

We live pretty much at the edge of a preserve, which explains the fruity goodness. No, that's not it. There's a conservation area as our view. We actually have heard coyotes and do have road runners. We don't hear cartoon sound effects. Out loud anyway. Only sometimes in my head… We also can hear the big cats at the rescue zoo a few miles upwind. We are weed farmers. Clearly we don't fit in with those who have manicured their expansive lawns, making it more user-friendly for the weeds to surely come. This development called Spanish Oaks was supposed to be 'natural', but then the rules changed and McHaciendas, McLexuses and McBMWs invaded. I believe we were the 12th or 14th occupied home (of eventually 400… about 150 built so far.) We were early settlers. Wish we still had that buckboard. I don't miss the gingham.

We had a cold snap the other day - the temperature actually went below freezing. Cover the spigots! Uh oh - our spigot covers are missing. True Texan ingenuity:

I believe there are two things you should never write about in a Christmas letter: religion and politics. There's simply too much room to offend.

You HAVE been watching all the Republican Presidential Debates* haven't you? (*Not to be confused with the Mecum Auto Auction!) So here are some thoughts to hang on your newly taxed Christmas tree. BTW: The economy is so bad, Pine Tree Car Air Fresheners are being used as Christmas trees in homes around the U.S. of A.

I am amused by and interested in the debates. After so many years in radio, trying to persuade hundreds of thousands of listeners to listen and like us, I see much of the world as a giant radio style "promotion" full of hype and bombasity. (Not to be confused by radio promotions which are pure and as genuine as the 8th caller.) Note that some of the contenders might have dropped out by the time I publish this, but that won't stop me, so sirree.

At this stage of the game – late November - there are still many players. And why not start with our own Governor Perry? He's a very personable guy with stigmata: bad college grades. They say he got a D in “meat” at Texas A&M. But I think he'd be a fun guy to hang out with. He'd be the one to get the guys together to put a Volkswagon beetle at the top of the stairs of the admin building. He shot a coyote while out jogging. Where do you put your pistol in a track suit? Well, never mind that – he was attacked. ANYBODY can make an oops, too. Nice hair. A few years back, the Governor’s Mansion was set ablaze by some ne’er-do-well. The guards missed it.

Rick Santorum has that bad latin-verb last name. Plus it sounds like a tuberculosis hospital-um. He's from my home state, Pennsylvania, but I think he's soon to be in the parking lot with the crowd of Clear Channel employees recently let go. To me he always looks slightly embarrassed. If they put his podium any farther to the wing, he'd be behind the curtain.

Newt. What a name. Isn't he on the endangered species list? I don't know much about newts, but looking at him, I wonder if he can puff up his wattle and do a good croak. But make no mistake, he's smart. He’ll say! Reminds me of our high school English teacher who introduced himself to our class by declaring we had a "plethora of dearth." Newt has to be careful, though, or he might cut himself on his wife's hair. When he speaks he sounds like a trumpet with a mute in it. He’s made about $100 million dollars since his bout of unpopularity back in the 90s. While barking or croaking or whatever at Bill Clinton for immoral behavior, Newt was cheating on his second wife.

Michelle Bachman. She's raised about a hundred kids in a wooden shoe, so apparently they had a refrigerator just for milk. From Lake Woebegon, Minnesota. Seemed batty at first, but that could have been the Palin effect, kind of an aurora. I think she should have changed her name to Marge before declaring, though.

Ron Paul. I LIKE him. He's seems so wacky. He's Fred McMurray in the movie Flubber. I also suspect he's right about a lot, and his Mister Deeds-isms makes me like the guy. If only ANY of these candidates could even come close to accomplishing what they throw around the stump! Has there ever been a president with two first names? Sounds like a young Andy Rooney.

Huntsman. A name right out of the Cabela's catalog! Who needs a first name? The guy has serious experience. Speaks fluent Chinese. And is a Mormon. One wife though. Second to Perry for hair. His podium has been so far away from the action, you have to feel for the guy. Well, he at least can leave early and beat the crowd to the parking lot.

~~Herman Cain~~. Hey, we had a Dwight, a Chester, an Abraham, why not a Herman? He reminds me of my uncle Bus*. (*His nickname, was not a vehicle.) I love the way he doesn't equivocate. His Monty Python-animation-style mouth splits his lower face and that great voice makes his case. 9-9-9 has some odd math but he says that's because we haven't studied the menu options. Various women claim things about him which he denies. But, “Cain and Able.” “The Cain Mutiny.” Plenty of name recognition there. Bad thought: "Pure Cain Sugar." If he isn't delivered in 30 minutes or less, he's free. Sorry. New nickname, as he’s suspended his campaign due to unfounded allegations: The Zipper.

Mitt* Romney. (*Misspelled German for "with Romney.") They accuse him of flip flopping, but to be the former governor of Mass as a Mormon – you'd expect a Catholic, so that confuses everything right there. He's been married since he was 8. He dresses well. He made a ton of money. That much money is heavy. That's why they call it a ton. Mitt reminds me of a guy I used to work for – good looking, "buttoned down" – and I loved it when Mitt scolded Rick Perry. And he did it without appearing too condescending. He's likely to be a front runner (no I am not rewriting much of this as history unwinds, and pages fall off the calendar like in an old movie) but politic running is hard to predict, like knowing WHICH Ethiopian will win a marathon.

November 21 – there's a warm wind blowing today – hard at times, from the south, a comforting hug as it blows through the oaks. This is the kind of day that makes me real pleased we chose these here parts a.k.a. Austin. We had a little rain the other day (still in extreme drought) but just like prayer feeds hope, our weeds have greened up, teased by the rain and by globally warmed late November sun, courtesy of Chinese construction, Indian Industry, cow flatulence, and factories in Akron, Ohio. Rick Perry hasn't bought into Global Warming. He thinks science should be another of a state's rights.

I recently had an amazement as Terri's new assistant's computer (which we supplied) stopped working within a month of purchase. Loaded with upgrades and programs, Terri hoped the store would swap drives or download it onto another computer. I scoffed: "This big box retailer has a heart of concrete. They'll want to exchange it, screw the programs, and us." Terri's has been on me about being negative, so I held back. And everything I thought would happen didn't. They weren't busy. They were helpful. They had another same model. Swapped our hard drive into it, three minutes, thank you sir. Terri may be onto something. 50 dolla later, that Toshiba is just like new, only with a very slightly-used heart again pumping mortgage data into the bloodstream of lenders so that deserving citizens can get their slice of the American Dream pie.

Excited by the thought of adding some snap to this letter with video via IPhone, I have been trying to figure out how to add it. I am behind the curve. Trying to get it to work in HD. if I can get it to show, it'll be a short short clip - an iBlink - and I will find something appropriately Holiday themed.

AH - here it is. Supposed to be in 720p. I can't be sure something didn't downrez it as it took me about two hours to get it in here in this "quality."

This year, again, our 'forever tree' will continue its timeless ways in the forever attic. There is one string of built-in apparently non-forever lights on it which don't light. Also, bringing it down the stairs is risky, as it wants to open and spear me. It's quite heavy, as forever weighs more than you might think.

Scientists have uncovered civilization near where Austin is, that dates back to 13,500 B.C. Back then most of the roads were dirt, and there wasn't even one traffic light! BTW, Austin is this city's professional name. Its first name was Waterloo. You can look it up. Now it's WaterLESS as our drought has sucked everything bone dry. Many of the docks on the lake now look like kids toys the day after Christmas: scattered all over the dry lakebed.

This may be the year to celebrate my new notoriety: says Amazon about me:

Reviews written: 4

Reviewer rank: 975,507

Helpful votes: 7 of 9

I have broken the million-reviewer-rank barrier. Happy dance! I am in the top 400,000 players of Angry Birds, too.

Meanwhile, over at HBO.com, today as I write this part, is CYBERmonday, and their "virtual agent" has gone goofy. She don’ understan’! On a related note, my car's voice activated-navigation control has also seemingly lost the ability to understand me. Not unlike Terri, or many others. “Cancel navigation” is in Wilton, Connecticut, says Audi’s Uhura*. (*Early Star Trek reference.)

This year on my birthday I will celebrate another milestone by having – and I'm not making this up – a back-to-back endoscopy and colonoscopy (actually, that'd be up-to-down.) I wanted to get it done on this year's medical insurance and that was the last date they had open. This is sort of like that golden spike moment of the joining of the halves of the intercontinental railroad. They knock you out so you don't feel or even remember the procedure, but do wake you up for the copay. And the knockout is via Propofol, recently in the news, as Michael Jackson's c-o-d. The Discovery Channel has expressed an interest. Seriously, there's apparently another way, but it costs a fortune and isn't covered by insurance. You actually swallow a camera (MUCH harder the other way.) The thing then travels along and sends back pictures. Everybody: "Eeeeuuuwww!"

Thanks for your understanding about our cardless Christmas – but at least you won't have that glitter stuck in your rug this year. It's a bummer that so many of our friends are scattered all across the country – we miss you and wish you Happy Trails Until We Meet Again.

Christmas 2011 - Bob and Terri Wood

TING TING A LING

2011-12-11T12:21:00.001-06:00

Yesterday we went to Home Depot and Terri chose the perfect Christmas tree. A noble fir. Now it is in its new temporary home, our house, and bedecked with lights. We will wait until dark to see if the lights are sufficient and spread according to best known geometric practices. We have one more string which we can use if necessary.

The ting ting a ling of the title is the sound of the needles falling off.

SO WHAT HAVE I HEARD YOU ON?

2011-12-05T11:40:00.000-06:00

When people learn I do voicework, that's the next sentence most say. And truthfully, I rarely can answer. It's an odd business. You do this and that, sometimes (like today) only part of something in which the other pieces don't yet exist, and when the piece shows, it may be for 'internal use' or at a convention of sales people or whatever. I rarely hear the finished version. Also, it's a global business. I've done stuff for as far away as South Africa. I would think there's be more commercial work, but commercials are just a small part of it. Some is acting, some is narrating.

I know a guy who was the voice of Benjamin Franklin at The Franklin Institute in Philadelphia - my understanding is there's this sort-of-statue which comes alive and greets visitors. That's Dave.

Today the business runs on auditions. Getting the work is really the job - doing the voicework is the easy (and often fun) part.

A MAN AND HIS TOYS

2011-12-04T12:32:00.000-06:00

I am so happy with my IPhone 4s (versus the scummy Blackberry - watch RIM go out of business in a year or so!) and my IPad2 that my toy lust is well satisfied. It's amazing. I do fear that future - sans-Steve Jobs Apple products will not be as easy or elegant, but there's hope someone will keep the quality high.

I WILL go for the IPad 3, assuming there will be a market for used IPad 2s. Many think the next one will have a much better camera and display, and that's all it needs. I can live happily after ever then.

If I had a spare throwaway $35,000 (not in the (crystal ball) I would upgrade my stereo. I can't see that windfall happening.

Meanwhile, the thought occurs to me what if Steve Jobs controlled BluRay (in my opinion a stupidly flawed interface, slow loading, stupid features) it would be a whole other experience. For that matter, his insane push for perfection applied to CARS would have been something to see.

Ironically, Steve had a 'thing' for the Beatles, and he's one of the very few I would say ranked right up there alongside them in his own way.

COMING SOON

2011-11-30T13:16:00.002-06:00

This year we have decided to not send out Christmas Cards. This will be explained in another post, but for those who maybe see this, and care, I will post my annual Christmas Letter very soon. Since it usually gets a positive response, that's one tradition I hope to keep.

BTW: Humbugs have been seen mating with BEDbugs in NYC. Be careful where you sleep!

XMAS WISHES

2011-11-09T12:49:00.002-06:00

We are thinking of not sending Christmas Cards this year. It seems so impersonal, then you might get one back and it is signed or printed with the senders' names... and nothing else. Xmas cards seem to be the lowest form of contact. This is part of the reason why I have been putting things (from glitter to Keep This Coupon coupons to a yearly spoof letter) inside - to have a longer moment of contact. Now with so many electronic devices and the ease of email, the costs of buying and stamping cards for that brief 5 seconds of contact... seems to be a waste of time.

Am I becoming curmudgeonly? Likely so.

Friendships mean more than ever to us, but not getting one from you doesn't strike you off the friend list. And hopefully if we send nothing you will still be our friend.

I can publish my letter - if there IS one - on this blog.

What do you think?

DUNKING FOR APPLES

2011-11-06T13:50:00.004-06:00

I recently replaced my BlackBerry with an Apple IPhone 4s. I also have had an IPad 2 for some months.

What surprised me was how underwhelmed the IPhone left me. Yes, it's cool and way beyond the BBerry, but it just hasn't grabbed me the way the IPad does. I'm not sure why.

One thing the Apple folks need to do is to make it possible to delete all incoming emails all at once from either device. The way it is now, you have to choose each e, after which you then delete them all at once.

Trash works well - you can choose a group delete. Done! Since I receive emails - identical emails - on My Windows i7 computer, the IPad and IPhone, I have seen them by the time I get to the second device.

The IPhone camera is much better than the IPad one. When they release the next IPad device, if it has a better display resolution AND better camera, I will sell mine and move up. As far as I can tell, those two features will be addressed.

I bought an add-on device which will make either Pad or Phone a replacement for three of my remotes. It's called an L5. It's a tiny IR emitter. Setup isn't that much fun, but the result will be cool. I won't try to mirror the TiVo remote because I really work it, turning volume up or down many times in most shows or commercial breaks - or skip through them. Don't get me started on TV audio!

I just finished reading the Steve Jobs book on the IPad, which was somehow odd and appropriate.

TOO LATE!

2011-10-09T11:45:00.002-05:00

I let my subscription to Esquire expire.

Saturday they sent me an issue as a come-on to re-up. In it was a writer's contest to celebrate their 78th anniversary. The story you submit must be just 78 words long. It gnawed on me for a day and I thought maybe I'd give it a whirl. Then I reread the rules and deadline for entries was midnight, two days ago.

I wrote two, and stopped tweaking them, or finishing the second, after I realized I was too late. But so as not to waste:

The 52nd President strode to the AT&T podium to address the three houses of congress. "Members of congress, Mr. Vice President, Mr. Speaker, honored guests from Exxon-Mobile, I come to you on this auspicious occasion to celebrate our latest budget reduction initiative. Starting this March, our paper currency will contain logos from patriot blue chip companies who have purchased space to help reduce our national debt. This is truly a great day for Walmart's United States of America!"

On the day the fish swam away, Pedro's net pulled up empty. He cursed God under his breath while making the sign of the cross, then kissing the silver Virgin Mary medal which had hung around his neck since his baptism. He scanned the horizon, and what appeared to be clouds were thousands of gulls, flying as one, away from land. As his oars dipped, they were unable to gain purchase as the sea had begun to effervesce.

I don't think the second story had a shot. I think they wanted a beginning, middle, and end. The first story is probably too jokey.

Well, heck.

LIMIT THE ADS

2011-09-20T13:54:00.002-05:00

Watch TV? The crawls and 'bugs' (logo in corner) are creeping into more and more of a program. The animations are getting larger, too. You're really into a drama, and now Mike and Molly come dancing in at 1/5 size along with text to tout their show. It's visual pollution! It seems to be on the increase too, in size, duration, and frequency.

On the internet, yes, sometimes you have to pay a penalty and are forced to watch a commercial before what you tried to see. But I just endured one where the commercial was seemingly as long as the feature I was after! On TV I believe you are forced to watch 8 minutes of commercials per 30 minute show. Most radio stations run between 14 to 16 minutes of commercials an hour.

We use TiVo. Record most everything, and speed through the commercials. Want to get rich? Invent the same for web-based ads! And to be fair: I will stop and watch a commercial more than once if I really like it.

POLITICS

2011-09-13T13:56:00.003-05:00

What's the latest approval rating down to? And isn't that very question a statement in itself? I think it was 17% for Congress. Uh, no, Gallup says I'm wrong:

"Congressional job approval is now 15%, up slightly from the record-tying low of 13% recorded in August, while disapproval is 82%, compared with 84% last month."

Obama was at 43%.

What I can't figure is how members of congress must not think it applies to THEM; they point at the other side and hurl invective at them. Hey, it's ALL OF YOU. You aren't getting the job done.

I say start over. Throw everyone out. Set term limits. Ban lobbyists altogether. I guess that a complete clean sweep would allow some boobs in, for sure, but the bonds with special interests would (hopefully) be broken, the influence-peddlers having to also start over, and in the time that took, maybe common sense from non-professional politicians would cause more good than bad. More action than inaction. More consensus than partisanship.

You all are embarrassing.

And for those candidates that stand there in debates and lie, who make things up, I'd like to have them all wired to a truth meter and cattle prod. Each mis-truth gets a shot. Each successive mis-truth gets more voltage. This idea isn't an electric chair type thing - the amperage would be low. Maybe after ONE outing, truth would prevail.

ADVERTISING...

2011-09-09T13:19:00.004-05:00

To get ready for a voiceover session I printed out the script a day early. I could rehearse and be well prepared.

Unfortunately the fan was on high because we are in the worst heat and drought, and it blew the script onto the floor.

The dog decided, "If it's paper and on the floor, I can take a dump on it." So she did.
By the time I discovered the smell and the target, it was starting to dry. I tried to scrape it off, was only semi-successful, but the inkjet ink isn't permanent so some words were blurry or obscured.

The printer stopped working, because when it is out of ONE ink color, it stops altogether to force you to the store to buy more.

I can't read off the screen because the microphone is in another room, and I lost the email and there isn't time to find it.

The producer calls and we begin.

In mid-spot I stumble over words I can't really see, and mumble something about "this crap." The producer hears this and launches in on me as being a spoiled, overpaid, prima-donna who is lucky to get ANY work, let alone this spot, and how dare I attack what has been put together by some of the finest minds in advertising?

Then I wake up.

DEAR DIARY

2011-09-03T12:30:00.002-05:00

That's what blogs are - today's diaries. I wonder if kids still keep them locked from their parents or open online for all to see.

I must admit, I understand, but don't 'get' twitter. I guess my social needs aren't on a par with those who tweet everything they do or think. And there are some adults who treat Facebook the same way... one guy I know posts "Good Night All" regularly. Way too nothing, there, though he's a nice guy in real life.

I stare at the top line in Facebook and think I should say/write something, but rarely does it meet my "Who'd give a darn?" filter. But then I am not the type of guy who enjoys multitasking. I tend to go straight to the goal. Watching TV? I watch. I don't want to converse by any means with the world online at the same time. If online I don't wish distraction via radio. Don't get me started on today's radio!

I am addicted to my IPad, and find many ways to entertain myself on it, but linearly, i.e.: one thing at a time, thank you. Skype on IPad works well and I enjoy it with or without the video! After a while staring at myself staring at them, though, I become self-conscious.

Imagine the instant communication taps which will change the way today's youth will interact with each other and the world as they grow! Will it DEpersonalize or Amplify a sense of belonging? Will it make those on the fringe feel special or left out? Remember the High Tech /High Touch theory? Are we now at the intersection of both? Or is high touch - human real time, real life interaction even more important?

Seems to me that one thing all this connectedness has brought on is an ease of hostility and polarity. Note the political parties playing the media with rancor and drum beats. Either there's a lot less civility and cooperation or the partisanship was always there but invisible.

FACEBOOK ISN'T TWITTER

2011-08-17T13:38:00.002-05:00

...and a blog isn't FACEBOOK. I have less to write that I used to - mellow due to the unusual heat here? We are over 5 TIMES normal for the number of 100+ degree days this spring and summer.

Some people I follow post things on FB like, "Good Night!" Uh.

I put a new profile picture up on FB and got several nice comments from some friends I miss, but don't have a lot of back-and-forth with. That felt good. Thank you. The picture was taken for a voicework site, as I formerly had a golden microphone instead of my bald head, and I figured if they'd like the voice, they'd idealize the face to their own preference. But I was talked out of that, as "it's a people business." I'll put it here too.

WAITING

2011-07-22T10:43:00.003-05:00

I am waiting for a script revision so that I can record it. My client DID say "in the morning" but his morning and mine may be different. I am grateful for the work, whenever it comes.

Recently I found out that one of the games I have done a character for has 20,000,000 players (online, not all at once.) I get a real kick out of doing these things which have some kind of wide play. You never know WHO will hear you.

While thinking about business, I think it's almost time to redo my demos (strings of short samples of different approaches to similar work.) Why redo them? Maybe it's the belief that new stuff is always better. The urge to tinker. Freshen. Show-off.

ROADRUNNER OR ROADKILL?

2011-07-14T09:29:00.001-05:00

The story takes place with a 'live chat.'

User Bob_ has entered room

Analyst has entered room

Analyst Mattew has entered room

Analyst has left room

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:12:54 CDT 2011)>
Hello! Thank you for choosing Road Runner Internet Technical Chat Support. My name is Mattew, how may I assist you?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:13:18 CDT 2011)>
Hello. My friend in Tennessee has tried numerous times to send me emails and they never make it nor do they bounce back to him.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:13:34 CDT 2011)>
Could it be the isp is blocked? dtccom.net

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:13:56 CDT 2011)>
Can you be more specific with the issue?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:14:03 CDT 2011)>
I don't receive emails he sends me.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:14:23 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:14:30 CDT 2011)>
I can help you with that.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:15:17 CDT 2011)>
Are you using Web mail or Email client(outlook)

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:15:35 CDT 2011)>
I use Windows Live Mail.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:15:53 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:16:32 CDT 2011)>
Are you able to send a mail?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:16:40 CDT 2011)>
Yes. He gets mine.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:16:59 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:17:00 CDT 2011)>
This is only from this fellow.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:17:25 CDT 2011)>
And it seems rather recent, as in several days to a week now.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:17:31 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:18:23 CDT 2011)>
Please send a test mail to your self and check it once.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:19:15 CDT 2011)>
Works fine. This is only from that one person.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:19:34 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:19:46 CDT 2011)>
I get many emails all day - but his have stopped when he uses dtccom.net

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:19:57 CDT 2011)>
When he uses webmail I get them.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:20:44 CDT 2011)>
Can you please login to the webmail.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:21:01 CDT 2011)>
I don't know how and don't really want to, either.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:21:47 CDT 2011)>
It may be blocked in your junk mails in your web mail.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:22:46 CDT 2011)>
You aren't quite following me. I use Windows Live Mail. When HE sends emails to me, I haven't been receiving them UNLESS he uses webmail as his source. When he doesn't, I don't receive them (but I used to.)

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:23:11 CDT 2011)>
They are not in Junk mail. I receive emails on three devices, so it's not 'my computer.'

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:23:50 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:24:01 CDT 2011)>
Please give me a moment.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:24:13 CDT 2011)>
I keep emailing him (which he receives) saying I don't see your answers to my questions - he responds that he's repeatedly sent them.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:26:59 CDT 2011)>
Please mark the "leave a copy on the server".

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:27:20 CDT 2011)>
Let me know the results once you have done with that.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:27:28 CDT 2011)>
And WHERE would I do that?

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:28:10 CDT 2011)>
I will help you with that.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:28:25 CDT 2011)>
Please give me a moment.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:32:46 CDT 2011)>
Please give me some more time to resolve this issue.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:32:56 CDT 2011)>
isps sometimes block other isps. Can you check if his is blocked and if so can you unblock for me?

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:36:50 CDT 2011)>
Please open accounts tab-> Properties-> Advanced tab.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:37:17 CDT 2011)>
You can find the "leave a copy on the server".

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:38:19 CDT 2011)>
It IS AND HAS BEEN SET THAT WAY

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:38:39 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:41:24 CDT 2011)>
Let me know whether you can receive the mails from the person in webmail?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:41:31 CDT 2011)>
yes

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:42:40 CDT 2011)>
He has two computers. His BUSINESS computer is the one from which emails have stopped coming TO ME. As far as I kinow, only to me. His laptop uses webmail and I get them, just like always.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:43:43 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:44:33 CDT 2011)>
He does not receive 'undeliverable' notifications.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:45:32 CDT 2011)>
... which leads me to wonder if TW has blocked his ISP?

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:46:55 CDT 2011)>
Can I access your computer remotely?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:47:05 CDT 2011)>
Why?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:47:16 CDT 2011)>
To do what?

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:48:09 CDT 2011)>
So that I can check were the problem is?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:48:07 CDT 2011)>
It isn't my computer. It's my Blackberry and my IPad also... all of which used to get his messages.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:48:24 CDT 2011)>
I am uncomfortable allowing you access.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:48:42 CDT 2011)>
Okay.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:48:49 CDT 2011)>
Please give me a moment.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:56:01 CDT 2011)> (Almost 8 minutes later)
Thank you for your patience.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:56:53 CDT 2011)>
TWC does not block any isp.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:58:38 CDT 2011)>
How ever there would be a problem in the settings of your friends please ask him to delete his junk mails.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 14:58:56 CDT 2011)>
I will. What else?

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 15:59:51 CDT 2011)>
That's it. it works if you delete the junk mail blocks.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 16:00:25 CDT 2011)>
Is there anything else I can help you with?

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 15:00:40 CDT 2011)>
No. Thank you.

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 16:01:26 CDT 2011)>
My pleasure chatting with you.

Bob_(Wed Jul 13 15:01:30 CDT 2011)>
So you are saying HIS junk mail settings blocks HIM sending ME an email? (The answer was Yes.)

Mattew(Wed Jul 13 16:01:35 CDT 2011)>
For more information about the products and services offered by Road Runner, you can visit this link anytime to get more help and knowledge : http://help.rr.com and check for online tutorials, FAQs and more details about Road Runner features.

And our story ends with no resolution. Have a nice day!

HYPE FEVER

2011-07-07T11:32:00.003-05:00

I may have contracted HYPE FEVER while doing voicework demos. This is a condition whereby the voice rises and you shout things like "BUT WAIT!" And swallow then regurgitate words like AMAZING, CALL NOW, LIMITED TIME OFFER and you gurgle up exclamation points like a babe on strained peas.

I am unsure what the cure is. Deep breathing, maybe. I'll try that. Pray for me.

THERE'S A KIND OF A HUSH ALL OVER THE WORLD

2011-06-28T09:07:00.003-05:00

Actually, it's me. I get a big kick out of the nature of voicework. If I am right about the timing of the schedule, my voice is now on some stations in Houston, Austin, Jacksonville, Indianapolis, St. Louis, Salt Lake City, Atlanta, Columbus, Portland, Phoenix, Minneapolis, Las Vegas, Denver, and on Satellite radio. More! I want more!

IPAD AND ME

2011-06-28T08:30:00.003-05:00

Or maybe it should read IPAD 2 and Me Too.

After months of backorder, it arrived, this sleek little screen and not much else. True to Apple's form and function, setting it up was a little Disney-magical. Somehow it all comes together, though I didn't see Tinkerbell in the box.

The included instructions are three sentences. More on line if you need it.

CLEVER CLEVER CLEVER. They've been around long enough that you either have one, have seen one, or are waiting for one.

Here's Apple's store at 2PM on a Sunday, and this doesn't show enough of the store which was packed - PACKED! Clearly, they know what they are doing.

And now I find myself an Angry Birds semi-addict, loving the "heh heh heh... nice" undercurrent audio while I try to figure out where to shoot the birds. Kudos to the developers.

I have also loaded apps like the free audio analysis app for which I once paid about $800 to get such functionality in an IPAQ (remember those?)

Somehow Skype works, even though it's not really an IPad version. THAT is said to be coming. The sessions I've had came with remarks about the great audio quality. I'd have to agree from THIS side of the conversation. Apple worked it out.

I'm almost at the video recording and editing stage. I say almost because my mind is running with how do I want this to look... what neat things can I do. Maybe I am too lazy or busy to mount a full-scale production, but with this gadget, you CAN.

THE ATOMIC GNAT

2011-06-08T08:39:00.003-05:00

There is an atomic gnat in our TV room. Or several. It's hard to tell. Physicists have determined that certain very very small particles may be able to be in two locations at once. And these gnats are very very small. So when that speck is walking across my glasses, it might also be buzzing the couch. I'm not sure.

Perhaps they arrived in the late winter when we had the deck door wide open - after all, there were no bugs we could see, and it was unseasonably warm. Or maybe they camped out in a new plant which now sits beside the tv. Or rode bareback in on the dog. Actually, the atomic gnat is small enough to pass through a screen.

And so I have begun the ritual of ridding ourselves of this pesky insect which is apparently attracted to my nostril like Bubba to a strip bar on a Friday after work.

I went to LOWES and bought the meanest, and apparently most toxic, pest strip known to man. The instructions say it kills flying things. They say don't be in the room with this horrible chemical for more than 4 hours. Disposal calls for a hazmat team. After more than a week, no gnat deaths have been recorded, though our own lifetimes may have been shortened.

I then resorted to the tried and true... the glue-y thing which hangs as a beacon of stickiness from the pull chain on the ceiling fan. 50s diners and truckstops of that era would sport these traps like stalactites, usually peppered with flies. But for me, no luck. I have avoided walking into it.

I read on the web how to build a trap... using cider vinegar and a soda bottle. But so far, it hasn't worked.

The atomic gnat is winning the war. I am pretty sure it's too small to be a predator drone and don't think I am being surveiled.

Prayer hasn't worked.

Bad tv hasn't worked.

I am unsure of my next move. For now, I am a swat team of one.

A BETTER MOUSETRAP?

2011-05-27T18:09:00.001-05:00

It has happened twice now.

After washing some windows, I left the bucket with some solution in it in the garage for the next round.

It's a big bucket and it had maybe four inches of soapy water in it.

Both times I later found a dead mouse floating in what had become a very stinky soup.

Mickey and Minnie's last bath is a sad memory.

THE VOICE OF...

2011-05-17T09:42:00.000-05:00

Over the past little while my voiceover business has brought a real wide variety of jobs:
narrating the celebration of a man's life; and intros and outros for a weekly church podcast. I played a proud, tall, Norse BEAR in a videogame, voiced a local pharmacy advocacy project, a tire safety piece for the Texas DOT, a narration about lessons learned from the Deepwater Horizon disaster, and a pitch for a security company trying to sell its system in Argentina. Small world.

I love doing voice work.

THE CARPET CLEANER

2011-05-04T13:37:00.002-05:00

Is overdue but we'll cut slack for it's only 7 minutes. So far.

We didn't realize it, but our carpeted areas have self-dirtifying carpet of a light color which shows off that feature really, really well. The carpet stretcher man said the only recourse to clean carpets is clean white socks. But I won't go shoeless full time. I am not turning Japanese.

The guys come in with a water heater and Tim-Allen modified sucker in a truck. They spray hot water with special sauce into the rug then wait a few seconds and suck it back out. This is a lot like a salary and taxes.

I think the world that created the Zamboni can do a better job. There should be whirling brushes, though come to think of it, I have never seen a street sweeper work well, even with its wire brushes spinning.

But we need more than squirt and suck.

By the time all dries completely, they are gone, and at that time you get to see how those special places will remain shrines to where the doggie rubbed the medicine we put into the her ear, or the spilled tea episode.

Oh - and the upsell is "Want Scotchguard with that?" No. We have posted a no-bagpipe warning at the door!

BY NOW

2011-05-04T13:31:00.002-05:00

I had hoped to have my new IPad 2 and even IPhone 5, though that one was more a silent prayer while using my hated Blackberry.

The IPad 2 is supposed to arrive at the reseller this Friday. They said that about last Friday too.

The IPhone 5 is delayed, says Apple pundits.

Meanwhile I must have mellowed some, as I am not so frantic to get the new toys as I might have been once upon a time. Hard to believe, but the Patience Institute has lowered my world ranking to 1,225,068.

THAT MICROPHONE IS LIVE

2011-04-15T14:50:00.003-05:00

The 'rule' is - if you are in the public perception, and are in a room with a microphone, assume it is LIVE.

Obama just broke the rule. He said some things which were a little more human than what you'd term Presidential. The message wasn't managed. Other presidents have also been caught.

I know of some guys who were fired for speaking on what they thought was a 'secure' line to a tech at their radio station. Too bad they were on the air over the music on one of the sister stations. Profane and detailed, too.

A BITE OF THE APPLE

2011-04-13T15:31:00.002-05:00

I am once again BLOWN away by APPLE. Specifically, the Apple Store, which today was crowded. I've ordered an IPAD 2 from another seller (soon to arrive) and thought I'd go the the company store for a cover and adapter. I was greeted and handed off to an associate who took me to their accessories and took what I needed from the display, then whipped out a device (maybe an Iphone with attachment? - It wasn't much bigger than that but it had a slot for card swiping, which he did. He then sent me the receipt by email and I was on my way, amazed at the ease of the transaction.

I then went up the road to another retailer of electronics - the one with 80+ check outs, lines, etc. where I paged through an IPAD for Beginners magazine... holy smoke, this device really IS a game changer in so many ways. I am excited.

MORE ADVENTURES IN THE COMPUTER

2011-04-05T19:04:00.002-05:00

Recall the Andy Griffith Show/ Mayberry jingle..."

Why is it this always seems to happen? You have to fix something or update something on your computer. You haunt the blogs and forums and find what seems to be good advice, It goes like this for me - you too?

Open Desktop.
Desktop, right. Got it. Easy.
Do to Control Panel
Got it. I am humming!
Open Accessories.
Yeah. No - wait. Is that here? I know where it was on my old computer.
Okay, maybe here. Yes. Of course. No wait, it's under programs, isn't it?
Then simply snarl the berg.dll
The WHAT? WHAT? How do you SNARL? That's NOT THERE. THERE'S NO CHOICE.

By this time I am lost. I am lost a lot.
Recall the Gilligan's Island theme now.

PLEASANT VALLEY SUNDAY

2011-04-03T13:29:00.003-05:00

I went to the plant department of Lowes today. What we need is a colorful plant for the shade. Oh sure, they can make a turtle bark and glow in the dark via DNA, so why not a shade flower?

People were swarming like flies.

There was a dead big fat porcupine on the road.

---

Yesterday we had lunch at the Four Seasons for Terri's Birthday. It was the busiest we've seen. A good sign for the economy? Then we walked the Art Fair. Some great stuff, especially one piece which just cost too much. It was what appeared to be - and wasn't -a poster for KILLER BLONDE in comic book headline-styled fireworks package. Bang!

PLANE CRASHES INTO OUR OLD BACKYARD

2011-03-28T09:35:00.000-05:00

SUNDAY, MARCH 27, 2011

Click this to see the story. Yes, that's our old house.

IGNORANCE IS BLISS

2011-03-18T15:20:00.003-05:00

...and may explain why Japan allowed reactor essentials to be placed in vulnerable-to-tsunami locations. With all the nuclear reactors in the world now (not to mention bombs), can't you expect something very, very bad to happen eventually?

Several weeks ago, Terri and I were on PCH - the Pacific coast highway, driving on vacation from Los Angeles to just north of San Francisco. The road is challenging and yet beautiful, rising to about 1200 feet above the ocean, and you are essentially driving without guardrail at the edge of a cliff in earthquake territory.

A week or so later, the very road we drove fell... down.

Here in Texas, the weather has turned warm, and the first squashed snake-in-the-street has appeared. It makes you wonder how many others there are, and where, as some are venomous... but, ignorance is bliss.

CALIFORNIA

2011-03-07T13:46:00.005-06:00

Terri looks for whales from our deck in San Simeon

Our tree house in Big Sur

The view from our waterfront room/deck in Sausalito, looking back toward SF.

Muir Woods (no relation)
We just enjoyed a wonderful week of Terri-planned vacation. She's great at this! We flew to LA then drove up to beyond San Francisco, stopping for a night or two along the way.

By the way, it hailed on us for about 15 seconds in LA and also snowed while we visited with my great friend, Howard. The snow lasted maybe a minute. This was in Sherman Oaks.

Everything seemed compressed in CA. compared to TX. I swear their traffic lanes are not as wide as elsewhere, and at one point, heading toward the Golden Gate bridge, some yahoo in a panel truck came within inches of sideswiping our rental car.

I will throw several pictures from the phone onto this. A new phone with much better resolution is about a month away.

Big Sur was as incredible as we remembered it (Post Ranch). Sitting about 1200 feet above the ocean, it's incredibly romantic.

OUR HERO BUILDS A COMPUTER FROM SCRATCH

2011-02-14T09:04:00.003-06:00

I wrote the following shortly after Christmas, but it took this long to get back into Blogger. The new machine works fast and fine, although there appears to be some issue with printing multiple docs, but I think that's the HP software. I don't trust HP in return.

ADVENTURES WITH MY NEW COMPUTER

The Christmassy New computer - hooked to an old monitor... doesn't show up. I can't find the discs to the old monitor if there were any anyway... connection is good, power is on, I give up for a few minutes of reflection..

Nerds: Yes I hooked up the keyboard (well, the mouse anyway, and it shows signs of life, although all I get on the screen is the instruction to move the mouse.

Okay – I have the new wireless keyboard going (I can see the receiver acknowledge it.) Nothing on screen though. I will again rip apart our cache of old install discs to find what I can.

I am lost and the starter gun hasn't been shot. Of course I am a MANLY MAN and expect setbacks, although, frankly, not this one. Since the old computer is beside it, and working, I can keep this journal.

I turn to hp troubleshooting on my old computer for instructions:

* If you have a flat panel LCD monitor, unplug the monitor power cable, wait about 30 seconds, and reconnect the cable and then turn on the monitor. This resets the electronics on the monitor.

This didn’t work.

Next step: try old working monitor on new computer. This will destroy all the care I took to dress the cables to lessen cable clutter, but no matter, for I am a man on a mission. WIN 7 pro or bust! I could also just go BUY a new larger monitor (planned for later) but let’s try this. We’ve really become addicted to computers, since the thought of losing my screen even for a little while gives me agita/anxiety/the willies.

Swapped monitors. Old one works in old computer, not in new computer.

I tried resetting the BIOS blind. Troubleshooting explained the sequence of keyboard strokes. Nothing. The next step is to take the box apart and be sure all the cards and connections are good. A REAL MAN in today’s world is not computer-intimidated. Now if I can just figure out which screws...

That was easy. Nothing was loose. And just like that, all back together again... but it still doesn’t work. Now I have to repack and send it back. I will not replace it with another of the same breed. When apart I also learned it will not accept my pro audio card. (Geek talk: it had open PCI express slots not a standard PCI slot, and even with an adaptor it seems there isn’t enough space.) Joy. More when I figure out what to do. But REAL MEN can handle a little setback here and there. I think the HP is not worth the trouble, or money.

I consulted with a GUY WHO KNOWS THINGS.

Just bought all the parts to BUILD MY OWN COMPUTER. Think of the trouble I will be in shortly. Way too much $$$ but it has everything I would want (it says here) and I am very hopeful that I can do it - or will have to buy local help. See, the prepackaged ones all have some shortcoming or cheapest something else. As I hope to keep it for quite a long long time, it should be hot as they come to start, then age with grace. Like me. PRAY for me. I don't know the mess I just climbed into.

The non-working one by HP is awaiting FedEx truck tomorrow, at the dropoff store. A final salute: “%#$!!%#$@!”

A friend writes: “Building a computer must be quite a project. Any advantages over buying a new one except for the price? Where do you get the kits? Any soldering?”

My reply: “I think the advantages to do it yourself is in a better choice of what's in it - the prepackaged ones come with a decent this and a cheap that. Choosing parts means you can have a good this and good that. The cost is about the same, but with advantages in what is included. (About $1200 for me so far).”

“NO soldering - everything is via some sort of connector.”

“But buying parts means it's not really a kit with instructions.”

And quick as you can say UPS a hundred thousand times, twin boxes arrive at Stately Wood Acres.

I look at the empty case - haven't even opened the box and already I have questions.

The build begins:

Well, there are instructions, but for each piece, in every language known to man. A 75 page ‘manual’ is 5 pages per language. There are MANY setup instructions once the thing boots, and it looks daunting, but I have to mount the hardware first (am writing in breaks from the tabletop.)

My first issue: understanding how to get the bare case apart. Something about plastic tabs. Do I push in or to a side? Push harder and risk breakage? Happily, I finger it out.

Removing the bezel: uh, what exactly is a bezel? Again, logic and careful futzing – bezel removed. Futz-o-meter barely on #2.
Now, replace the panel with cutouts for the ins and outs. EASY does it. Success. No futz.

Now the motherboard. Must be extra extra careful. De-Static wristband. Count holes. Mount standoffs. Don’t touch any soldered parts. Almost fits. Almost. Almost. Push a little. Holes align with some persuasion. Screws fit – some hard to get to, but I persevere. Next, the power supply.

My back hurts. Boy will I feel great if I can do this. Boy will I ever be confused if I arrive at the BIOS setup – there are SO many options and I am unsure which apply and how many matter. But let’s get back to the hardware. Power Supply (750w vs. the 300 w in the HP I returned. Arf!) Must not be overconfident. Must not drip sweat onto or into anything.

Ooops.

Yes, I am learning a lot. Sometimes the hard way. Like when I turn the computer case to stand up and the processor falls out of its home. I loudly proclaim NOT MY FAULT though clearly I didn’t understand the pressure necessary to close the latch. I DID close the latch, but a lip wasn’t engaged. Thanks, Microsoft, for that unclear pictograph with no words of help. (That way they don’t have to print all languages and it saves paper and money.) Well, it’ll be a miracle if this thing works from the get-go anyway. They’ll build a chapel and pilgrims will come worship here if it does boot up with no smoke.

Now the DVD drive and two hard drives are in – not connected, but in. Memory is in. Wiring, not so much. I am still trying to figure that out. Tomorrow I will be back at it.

Just getting away from it all and thinking about it, helped. Also, finally finding the explanations of the connectors and where they go. I don’t know how I missed this, but I did. There’s one long receptacle with many pins into which many of the power and other connectors hook up into the motherboard. What I mistook for one LONG socket is really many. That’s a big help! Little by little it comes together. It’s hard to SEE in some of the tight spaces with widdle connectors to place.

As I write this it still isn’t working, but I am sending emails and screen pictures (via phone) to the guy who convinced me to build my own. There’s an interesting twist to the process: I read the instructions, am lost, return later, reread, and it starts to make sense. Not in the DO THIS DO THAT part but in the HOW do you do this, HOW do you do that? I had lower grades in school, I think, because I would see possibilities which weren’t covered. There were never enough answers. Not enough explanation. This is a theme to my life.

I am now at the point where I am trying to configure the twin hard drives to have one mirror the other. Like building this, once I figure it out, it’ll be easy. For now, I keep looking for a screen I haven’t found. I don’t want to load anything until I have this done, otherwise the drives won’t be the same (or do they mirror after the fact? – A good example of the questions which go unanswered. I can imagine it works either way.)

Later --- I am now at WINDOWS IS LOADING FILES. This could be good. I have no idea how long it’ll take. Now after about a minute or two it is starting Windows. And I have a nice colorful yet blank screen. This is not the Blue Screen of Death. It has swirls on it. Windows 7 Pro is a large program. My computer is fast. But it couldn’t be THAT fast. Which is probably why the screen is blank. AH – it wants me to respond. I do, and on it goes. Until I discover a shattered disc in the packet. Can’t fully configure without it.

Monday I chat with a rep from Newegg who finally relents and sends me the CD or DVD – I can’t tell which it is.

Then I decide to go for it and after research and consultation buy a 27 inch new screen. It arrives later in the week and is HUGE. I have a 19 inch now. The printer will move off the desk.

If all checks out, I will run both computers while I try to figure out which programs and files should be transferred and kept forever. I still have 20 year old video I shot and NEVER WATCHED. I am a digital packrat. And now I have even more cheese.

CHROME SWEET CHROME

2011-02-14T09:02:00.002-06:00

It may be a conspiracy. While I cannot get into blogger with my old computer or my new one, even after their cookie-and-java dance, Chrome worked first time out. Could it be a way they push you to Chrome? Never mind. I am back.

2010 CHRISTMAS LETTER

2010-12-24T13:19:00.002-06:00

If you didn't get this or you received it and didn't get it, I apologize. Here below is the 2010 Christmas letter:

Another Christmas letter! How time flies, although time is apparently upset with the TSA for what it considers unseemly groping. Maybe if they could rig those backscatter XRAY machines to kill any bedbugs you picked up in your hotel room they’d be popular. It’s ALL marketing.

You know you are lonely when you go through a TSA feel-up “just to make new friends.’
I think the solution to the full body pat downs is to hire Hooters girls for the guys and Chippendale guys for the women, though some guys might have trouble when they later try to buckle their seat-belt.

Our only ‘pro’ sport here in Austin is University of Texas sport and after a pretty unimpressive football season, as I write this, I am listening to the game on streaming radio. When you can put over 100,000 people into the stands, you are pro, officially or not. Of course when they lose, many people stay home. Average ticket price is $70. Plus parking. Plus food and beverage. We’ve been spoiled by great teams until this year. The rays blasting from the huge Godzillatron in the end zone apparently will grow artificial grass.

Friday I received an email from an old high school buddy who was ‘thinking of me’ when he spotted a Beech Staggerwing airplane in (ready?) Cambodia. I took him flying once, in a much cheaper plane, from Phung Dien Pennsylvania to Bien Tem New Jersey. He may have seen me stagger at one of his frat parties.

In April I went back to working for the man. Back to banker-controlled-radio, but not in management – this time in production (of commercials.) I still have the home studio, but wanted to be around people more; however, without the stress of driving the bus. Of course this is radio in 2010, so, after a few months, my boss was fired. Not because of me. Something about his zipper, they say, and someone’s chin. As for me, I say things like “located at...” “today and tomorrow only!” and “a sale you can’t afford to miss.” Sadly, there isn’t much creativity. I did manage to get a duck quacking into a New Year’s Eve hotel commercial (“you can sit home with cold duck... OR...”)

Our housing development (not our house) went into foreclosure, and was purchased by a bank, said to be ready to churn it. There was an interesting ‘meet the new owners’ meeting which only lacked torches and a march to the bank-castle by the villagers.

Through the station I have met some ‘stars’ on the country music scene, one of whom has 6 Grammys, - awards, not extended family - he went to a competing high school in the Philly suburbs. We hit it off really well and I thought maybe a new friendship was happening. This guy (Ray Benson – look him up) was the ‘station voice’ of one of the stations I work for. He’d be in to record every once and a while and I felt I might actually have a new buddy there. But the new manager fired him.

The GRAMMY office is right next to the radio station, and they have one on display – I went in and asked if I could take a picture with me “listening” to it. The receptionist went nuts – “Only winners can be photographed with a Grammy!” I wanted to say, “or what? Will the Grammy police sing me to jail?”

Offering our best wishes to the economy, Terri and I are buying new computers for Christmas. This will be followed by a period of lost files and repurchased software in versions that will take advantage of the blazing speeds at the edge of the state of the art. Our home computer is 7+ years old. Yes, it does run on electricity. But only when it wants to. We’ve taken advantage of a sale and Terri has her spankin’ new Toshiba now. I am shopping, trying to find the best most reliable one.

Last Winter, much too late to make it to the Christmas Letter, we went on a sailboat charter out of St. Martin or San Maartan – an island with two names, because one half of the island is Dutch and the other side is French. Wooden shoe = Dutch. Jimmy Choo = French. We traveled to St. Barts, too, which is short for St. Bartholosomething. The streets are paved with wealth. In the harbor - yachts in packs – all over 200 feet long! We saw one which was almost 400 feet long (costing almost $400 million!) St. Bartholosomething usually vacations with St. Ostentageous, patron saint of the u*berrich... (*no umlaut on this old computer, German students.)

In July. we shuffled back to Buffalo for a surprise party for Terri’s mom’s 90th birthday. It was a real surprise since it wasn’t her birthday yet! Amazingly, the family came together and she had no hint. Family, friends, tears, hugs, smiles. St. Buffalo is the patron saint of snow.

I can’t remember if this was in the last letter but late last year we both got new cars. Now we can look good doing 20 mile-an-hour runs out of the development to enjoy single-lane slowdowns where the road is being widened. Eventually the endangered salamanders which are said to live under the old bridge were aced out of a three year long EPA study for the widened bridge. St. Salamander is patron saint of the EPA.

As the development holds its collective breath awaiting new owner/s, construction on the 8000 sq foot home beside us has again accelerated. It was said to have been sold by the initial builder to some other entity which is pouring money into the project. At this moment they are laying grass. St. Grass is the patron saint of Irrigation Sprinklers.

On the other side of us – the only undeveloped lot nearby, we found new owners squatting on the dirt. We introduced ourselves to this family of five. Dad was ‘in women’s shoes’ in San Diego, we learned (as Terri nearly snapped a neck-something on her way to hyper-attention.) Apparently that was a profession, not a lifestyle choice. Anyway, as the story goes, too much pressure took the whole darn family to the south pacific for 2 and a half months to chill out, in the heat. (Try to explain that sentence to a non-english speaker!) So they searched the world, could apparently live anywhere at all, and chose the lot next to us. That says something. What palace will appear remains to be seen as they have yet to have the home designed. It seems to take a year or so to actually build most of the homes we’ve seen in the neighborhood, so when the first bulldozer arrives, the clock will start ticking. St. Bulldozer is the patron saint of Diesel.

Boy, this annual writing has mellowed from the forces of age, wifely approval, and to whom we send this letter. There’s not enough edge for my taste, but you can still get a pretty good paper cut with it if you fold it just the right way, so there’s at least some sting left.

Allow me to pimp ourselves? Voicework: bobwoodvoiceovers.com Loans: Big-Texas-Mortgages.com

Terri and I wish you the very best Christmas and let’s go for a much improved New Year for all!

FA LA LA LA snif LA SNEEZE*

2010-12-24T10:36:00.003-06:00

It's the day before Christmas and I am dying. Okay, I feel like I am, though I don't think it's going to happen from Cedar Fever, a local allergy, which I have. BOY do I have it. It hit me like a ton of bricks yesterday PM and today I find my doc is closed for the rest of the year. So we will try Urgent Care - there's a shot - and darn it, I don't know what it IS, that the doc would give me... a long lasting something which lessens the misery. Maybe I can google it. But it's not an antihistamine or anything like that - and sometimes it works well and other times not so well. But my head is about to explode. Last night, trying to sleep, my sinuses made my teeth hurt!

Pity party at 2.

OLD COMPUTER NEW COMPUTER

2010-12-20T18:00:00.001-06:00

A new computer is being dropped or dropped off by the delivery guy today. It’s a combined Christmas and Birthday (Dec 23) present. If you have ever switched computers, you know there’s a whole lot of work to it.

First, you must decide whether or not you really want to keep everything you have on your old computer. Not at all unlike the kitchen junk drawer, stuff seems to collect all by itself. Now with 1TB hard drives (yes, TWO!) there’s even less incentive to be neat and clean and orderly, instead, to HOARD.

Since I have kept the old drive down to under 200GB (1/5th of a TB), I think I will be fine, but still, there’s this compulsion to REjustify all savings. Especially so on those little programs you buy for $29 or whatever and use once in a – yet always important when you do – while.

Some of these (example, a form builder) are important to one of our websites, but can I load the PROGRAM in addition to the files?

Secondly, how the heck do you transfer your email addresses? Maybe it’s time (nooooooooo) to delete all the ones which arrived when I wasn’t looking, or determining which of the three email addresses I have for some people, is correct.

Third, there’s the learning curve on WIN7. Said to be easy, I look forward to a well-thought-out design. You might think they know what they are doing, but there was that Vista thing everyone hated. Goodbye XP (except at work) hello 7.

I calculate the new computer will be as much as 10 times faster than the old one. I sure hope so. Even the second page of an internet site was often slow to load, if it ever DID load. Truth be told, the old computer hasn’t been completely right since the original hard drive failed, no matter what I did to it.

I look forward to be doing the blog necessaries so I don’t have to find a backdoor into it as I do now. Something about cookies. But they ARE enabled. %@$#!

ELECTRONICA

2010-11-13T11:06:00.002-06:00

Terri's phone died. We had to get a new one as 'they never saw one do that before' and 'we don't fix it we send it away' which won't work for business!

So she upgraded. I will too, by March... the window opens then for a hefty discount. Will probably go with a Droid. I have begun to hate my Blackberry. It's slow, with a small screen - Internet is a joke. Call quality IS good, as is the audio of a call.

We are slated for new computers too... and I watch the ads carefully. One tactic I have noticed is the local big box store doesn't give model numbers, so you can't easily go online and read reviews.

I am really looking forward to a faster processor and maybe even Win7. I am not looking forward to trying to get stuff off this machine and onto the other. As the Chamber Brothers used to sing: THE TIME HAS COME TODAY. Well, not today - as I am watching for the best deal on an i7. I expect to have them side by side for a while as I try not to lose anything 'important.'

Yes, I have twin outboard hard drives. No, I really don't know what I am doing; suspect moving programs to be problematic. Files I can move. The old Gateway is over 7 years of age. If it all goes smoothly then the pilgrims will come and want to build a shrine on the site of the miracle.

And our Blu-ray player has decided to unwork. It used to work. Now just eats discs and pauses. I am trying to update its firmware. Time will tell, as the process takes a good part of an hour.

TESTING 1 2 3

2010-11-07T13:00:00.003-06:00

In the paper today I saw an article about the public radio station in town. A show host was in a studio with about $10,000 of microphones. And I would value the ( discontinued) microphone in my studio at work at $65 new. That's at a company valued at $16 Billion (yes, B!). WTF?

CATCHING UP

2010-10-23T10:03:00.004-05:00

There's apparently a force called Blog Momentum or BlogMo which causes bloggers to continue their output as it's encouraged by the mass of what you have written before. I am immune, but it's not completely my fault.

I am at work most of the day and it would be hell to try to do this on my Blackberry, with which I have a love/hate relationship. And my at-work computer comes with a prominent warning that corporate can see all we do. Well, if they want to see this they can track it down. Who knows what the surveillance weasels would think of my style or thoughts? I'd rather not 'share.'

When I get home it seems I just don't have the mojo to blog.

Maybe the work benumbs me.

Also, as I have blogged before, I can't log in through Explorer because it wants me to do whatever-the-hell-it is that I have already done (something with cookies - I stopped looking for solutions and have to get in through FireFox, which isn't, but probably should be, my default browser.

Now that I have laid that out, I have also forgotten what I was going to write about.

POLITICS

2010-10-03T15:18:00.003-05:00

I admit I am sorry to say Obama has disappointed. Maybe the system is broken with extreme partisanship wasting resources and time and money.

The polls show such a low regard for ALL politicians! The electorate just wants CHANGE fercryinoutloud. And that brings some strange people to the fore.

These guys and women in power must be nuts to think that dissatisfaction doesn't apply to THEM. They point to the other side and make noises as if the country wants their side to win and fix it all.

Ain't gonna happen.

I wonder if we'll see a coalition in the near future.

Will voter turnout sag (as in it's all hopeless, so don't bother) or will the frustration bring out many who want to be heard?

Locally, Governor Rick Perry is up against Bill White. I'd like to see White win, but his ads are SO bad! Perry's are just about perfect.

I am sorry to say that I think a lot of who wins has to do with their handlers, consultants, and of course - we all knew this - money. Say the wrong thing or waste a message, and you may be out of the game.

One of White's bad radio ads starts off with him talking about how he... a guy with such big ears... I guess they are trying to make him 'just folks.' Perry's, on the other hand, speaks about glowing accomplishments (real or imagined, but impressive.) For the masses, for the uninformed, they'll go with the guy who sounds like the winner. People love winners.

I think that without terms limits, without blocking lobbyists, without line item veto, we are close to sunk. And now there are also blatantly apparent idiots running for office while the ship of state is listing so badly.

COMPUNUTS

2010-09-25T18:33:00.003-05:00

Wow, it's been a while since I have blogged. Must remember. Part of the problem is this slow old computer doesn't want to work all the time on Explorer, and I only use Firefox when Explorer doesn't work, or I just say "the hell with it" and walk away.

I am becoming spoiled by the computers I use at work, too. They aren't what I'd term speed demons by any measure but are notably quicker than this one.

Yesterday I moved attitudinally from "Soon we have to think about which computer..." to "Must replace this slow beast with a new one. This sucks."

I want an i7 with 1Tb hard drive, 8GB memory.

The real issue isn't the box, it's the software we'll have to rebuy in 64 bit versions if available. Heck, some of our stuff might work, but the software (Word is version from 2003) is ancient.

Terri's company issued laptop is also showing some false teeth, so that one might be replaced first, and they aren't giving them out any longer.

Of course we just had the house repainted, so to be fiscally appropriate we might wait until Christmas or even after-Christmas sales. But heck - if the box costs even $1000 I will be surprised if the software isn't that and more.

The process of deciding which programs are worth keeping, then tracking down which software we might re-license or give up - that's mighty time consuming!

It's all about the need for speed, isn't it?

Plus, we'll have to learn Win7. Plus I will have to install my pro-soundcard.

I wonder if I might install my existing hard drive as an extra in the new machine, change it's drive number and still have the programs on it intact and workable? That'd make things much easier. Or would it?

I BELIEVE.

2010-08-29T12:11:00.001-05:00

READ THIS!

Although the world wide web has been around for just 20 years, it is hard to imagine life without it. It has given us instant access to vast amounts of information, and we’re able to stay in touch with friends and colleagues more or less continuously.

But our dependence on the internet has a dark side. A growing body of scientific evidence suggests that the net, with its constant distractions and interruptions, is turning us into scattered and superficial thinkers.

PICNIC

2010-08-22T09:41:00.003-05:00

Yesterday was Terri's company picnic, at the home of one of the owners/founders. It was a well attended summer 'do.' At one point I counted about 24 people and 2 dogs in the pool of jumping in or out. (And the pool isn't huge!) But it was 102 degrees.

The host had suspended from saw horses what appeared to be a 24 foot strip of half pvc pipe, ready for a 24 foot ice cream sundae. Sure enough, at the appointed time (when he perceived a lull,) the host appeared with gallons of ice cream and loaded the trough. Helpers then spread chocolate sauce, caramel, crumbled Oreos, sprinkles, M&Ms, peanut butter cups, whipped cream, and more.

The kids were assembled behind a line. Spoons were distributed. The ice cream was melting. Adult ice cream-o-philes like me were impatient. The kids were given the "go!" and they did, scooping up spoonfuls. One dog was licking the end of the trough. He was also getting all sorts of sticky all over him. After a few minutes adults moved in for a few scoops.

Then the host yelled "food fight!" and remaining goo was suddenly scooped and hurled by many of the kids. I retreated. One young girl smeared chocolate sauce and whipped cream and whatever all over herself.

I imagine that today ants from several counties are headed to the Woodstock of Sticky Sweet.

THE SHORT LEASH

2010-08-15T10:35:00.005-05:00

At work I face twin computer screens (from twin computers). My younger associate has FOUR screens, one of which is tuned to CNN. Of course I go everywhere with my Blackberry. Yesterday I went outside to the pool and partly due to the heat, left the Blackberry inside the house. As I approached the door, I felt 'wrong' somehow, and realized it was due to the loss of connectivity.

To what? I guess to the swirl of social and infomedia which have become omnipresent and important. That sense of connectedness, no matter how illusory, has become an important part of life today. Are we really 'connected' to the 'friends' on Facebook? Maybe some. Maybe not.

Our radio cluster's sales manager of internet is 26. The associate mentioned above is, I think, 28. THEY GREW UP ON COMPUTERS. They can type without looking at the keyboard.

I remember being a small kid when one Christmas Santa brought me a "typewriter" in which there was a wheel you had to turn to each letter. Almost a manual Selectric, except it was a wheel, not a ball, and you had to do everything physically. I didn't like it. Imagine how far we've come from that perspective! What would an 8 year old of today do with that toy? His or her world is keyboards and mice.

STUFF HAPPENS

2010-08-07T10:42:00.004-05:00

I couldn't get into Blogger on Internet Explorer. Still can't, even after trying all the fixes they suggest. This is through Firefox. I believe I took all the corrective steps back in Explorer, but noooooooooooo.

I've been work during the day then I seem to run out of time and so haven't been feeding the blog. If anyone is left, thank you for visiting!

I write for the exercise and to stay sane. Semi-sane.

There IS a thread here - stuff happens - when home from work yesterday I saw one of our landscaping zones gushing water. It wasn't on and wasn't scheduled to be on, but there it was. Since I couldn't shut it down, and never knew where the landscape kill valve lived, I had to shut off water to the house after beating on the controller.

Our email pleas were answered and Jim The Man came over and cannibalized one of our dead zones and rebuilt the solenoid actuated valve. I now know how to turn off the landscaping water supply. Also we found the cause - our grasscutter people ran over the controller with the big rider mower and killed it, releasing the water.

Then they split.

I am amazed how either things have changed or I was lucky for so many years of peaceful home ownership elsewhere. In the 5 1/2 years we've lived here, we've had pool pumps die, gush, or leak, irrigation issues, and even saw a light bulb fire up (literally) when activated by a timer. That almost took the lampshade out and that would maybe have burned the house down! We've had in-wall plumbing leaks, in-floor leaks twice on the same toilet. Floors replaced, walls replaced.

I don't think our builder was negligent, either.

Neighbors one house away were hit by lightning. Neighbors whose house is maybe a mile or more away (and we can see from here) have been hit by lightning TWICE.

And the computer... goes semi-sluggishly along. I am reading the ads with great interest.

KEYBOARD MEMORY

2010-07-17T12:40:00.002-05:00

At work I have twin computer keyboards as they access twin computers. As a necessity, each is off center compared with this one. I find my muscle memory of where keys are is growing worse as each offset affects my typing (is it even called typing?) I also seem to have become slower here on this centered keyboard.

WILLIE'S 4th of July Picnic

2010-07-05T12:25:00.002-05:00

It was up the street a few miles this year. We had free tickets. We spent 3 (of 12+) hours, finally found a seat on the grass (a 7500+ person sellout) and enjoyed the music and warm breezes, The crowd is a mixture of cowboys, hippies, yuppies... they sold a TON of merch - my favorite was the Willie Nelson First Aid shirt with a large leaf of pot on it. But I bought a cap at a way overpriced $30, instead. I wear caps at work due to the track lighting which would shine into my eyes if I didn't. Plus, there can't be too many like this show.

Later we came home and watched 9 more fireworks displays in the near and far distances! A warm breeze made it perfect.

FIREWORKS!

2010-07-04T13:06:00.003-05:00

I was such a fireworks kid! I LOVED them. I bought them illicitly whenever I could (illegal in my home state - Pennsylvania). I made my own. Oh for fireworks. And the chemicals we bought back then would surely trip a terrorist list investigation today! Some of the stuff was highly dangerous! All of it could burn things (like fields (check), fingers (check)) or blow up big time. Probably the largest explosion was in a three foot rocket (aluminum tube) which, when it blew up, echoed around the hills for some time. It was the loudest explosion I had ever stood close to - I was about 16 at the time. The kid who lit the fuse and ran was passed by shrapnel from the explosion.

The must be angels.

What I cannot understand is that as I aged I lost my enthusiasm, and I cannot figure out why. Last night we had a great place (private home) to watch a great display but I was feeling lousy and didn't go. Out our TV room window we could see several displays in the distance and other than a few more creative rockets, it was ho-hum.

Maybe the years of 'syncing" radio music to fireworks displays drained me (they cannot sync well and very few people ever bring radios.) In Minneapolis (actually St. Paul) we were supposedly involved with the largest fireworks display 'this side of the Mississippi.' That would be hyperbole. But it was a huge display.

As a young kid, I remember sitting in an alley by the beach in Ocean City NJ where some grownups (no doubt hammered) had several shopping bags of fireworks and set them off right THERE, right in front of the assembled kids. That was SO cool.

One fourth of July my dad and uncle (hammered) went down to the beach and shot 45s at the moon over the water (loud.)

One fourth of July a bunch of us went late to a display and somehow ended up closer to the zone than the crowd, and stood right under where the shells were exploding. I remember 'coming to' on my knees. I felt hammered into the earth by the explosions.

I still love the smell of gunpowder - the sulfuric smoke. But in our 5 1/2 years here have avoided buying ANY fireworks at the many stands open in the next counties for 10 days twice each year. And I don't know why.

Maybe if they sold Cherry Bombs?

HPs NASTY SCHEME

2010-07-04T10:16:00.003-05:00

Our $270 all-in-one printer/fax/copier just cratered. Here's the scam: it holds four sources of ink - three colors and black. When any of them (in this case, yellow) runs dry, the printer will not allow printing 'to preserve the health of the printer' even if the black ink is full and the item to print is black!

However, after an online search, I found ten pages of disgruntled HP owners writing about how replacing that yellow ink DOESN'T GET RECOGNIZED, and there's no work-around.

My dilemma - do I go buy yellow and try? Risk another $22 to feel like a fool? Or save whatever the cost of a new printer? (I will try the yellow.)

Apparently if you call HP they will try to sell you another printer. IF you can understand the foreign tongue on the associate you get in India or wherever.

Yes, I have loaded the latest drivers, rebooted, restored, etc. BTW: their instructions SUCK.

One guy took an axe to his HP before going out to buy a Cannon.

Man I just hate it when machines or devices make decisions for you - presets forcing A or B when you want "A and a half." We have lost so much control in our busy lives to industry, or government - it's a shame.

The last thing I want in this world, right above blood blister, is another printer.

- Later -

Well, after my replacing yellow ink, The HP 8500909g went through a lot of introspection and decided... I needed a 'blue'. Very warily I bought both cyan and magenta inks and loaded them in... as by sheer coincidence (cue suspicion music) I received an email that we should extend our soon-to-expire warranty on this beast (huh? --- didn't realize it was under a year old!) But after replacing the remaining two inks, the machine whirred and clicked and whirred and began to spit paper. IT WORKS!

Now I will walk away while I can.

TIME KEEPS ON SLIPPING INTO THE FUTURE

2010-06-21T18:39:00.003-05:00

Sez the song. And true it is! This computer's days are numbered. Seems to have issues which registry cleaning, etc., along with lots of anti-virii cannot solve. Plus it's old.

If dog years are people years times 6 or 7, then a computer age must be people age x 20, don't you think? This computer, by that measure, is... 140.

It isn't the $$$ that keeps me from running right out, it's trying to get updated versions of all the programs. And deciding which we HAVE TO HAVE and which to let go forever. A computer (for me) is like a crowded closet that you don't have to look into... everything is there where you left it. Deciding what to throw out is painful, and I KNOW I'll throw away the ONE or DOZEN programs I have to have afterwards.

When it's too late.

Will an i5 do it? Will I miss XP?

Looks like at $699 you get a lot for your money.

POOL VERSUS BOAT

2010-05-29T10:24:00.002-05:00

A boat is a hole in the water into which you pour money. I say a pool is a hole OF water you pour money into. Not nearly as pricey as a boat, but the chemicals and service calls do add up, and apparently never stop.

I was just trying to figure why our salt-based chlorine generator had stopped doing its thing. Took it apart. Got it back together. Restarted. Fixed new squirt/leak where I hadn't tightened enough. Now I watch suspiciously as the salt reading seems unresonably low.

I feel an impending replacement in just down the road.

HOWEVER, as today is scheduled to hit mid-90s, this will be the first dip into the pool. Water temp is 81 - right where I like it.

SIXTEEN TONS

2010-05-22T12:02:00.002-05:00

Tennessee Ernie Ford had a hit long ago with SIXTEEN TONS. Part of the lyric went "...another day older and deeper in debt."

I got a job job. This is different and apart from my voice work out of ye home studio. This is weekdays 8:30 to 5:30 (I wish - often the days stretch... next Friday, the entry to a long weekend AND start of a month should be an avalanche of work.) I don't mind volume, but don't thrill to it when several people are demanding attention simultaneously.

For the past 30 years I was the boss of at least my department, or more. Now, I am a worker bee. Lowly. This brings an interesting perspective. You sure aren't on the inside - don't know what's going on, just do those commercials, or load them into the big file server which runs the radio stations.

I guess you could say I am an unnecessary unexploited resource, but I knew that going in.

Most of the people are really nice and I enjoy interacting with them. Several of the talents are TRULY talented - much much better than you'd generally find in a 'market' this size (partly a testimony to the desire to be in Austin, I think!)

In just the past few weeks - I am new - I have worked with a few very interesting souls... a multi-grammy award winner, several singers, a guy who climbed mount Everest, an Indy driver, a Nascar driver. I interviewed a set of amazing kids who survived cancer or serious injuries - all resilience and courage and undamped spirit in such small packages!

ENTERING THE NOW

2010-05-16T08:53:00.002-05:00

I'd write 'the future' but that's not really true.

I just loaded my first APP.

No, we don't have IPhones... we have Blackberries. I was satisfied with my last phone but when Terri needed a Blackberry and the deal was two for one, well, why not?

Yes, I envy the IPhone people but the Verizon deal is better when you have two phones on the same account. Better coverage too? Or is that an urban myth? Yes, some of the apps look great and I LOVE the IPhone larger screen. Maybe someday. But for today, how can you beat free?

Seems that somewhere along the line, the Blackberry people made apps more attractive, or I was lost from the start - unsure which, but I just looked through hundreds of apps which came up clear (though small on the BB screen.)

I loaded a stopwatch. It was time.

TIME-WARNER IS RUN BY THE DEVIL

2010-04-08T15:37:00.003-05:00

TIME-WARNER has been a constant pain. If it's not Internet trouble, it's TV. I sit awaiting another tech visit as I write this. We don't get many of the HD channels for which we pay. They never got it right. Some channels work, some don't. Come back again and others will and others won't. From what I read, we are not alone at all.

We use their Cisco Tuning Adaptor into a TiVo HD3 with a multi stream cable card. After driving to their depot, getting a number, receiving the box, driving back, it didn't work. They imprisoned me in the home again - a tech finally arrived and said I needed a new tuning adaptor, and that he didn't have any. Back to the store. Back home. Replug. Still didn't work.

The latest example of their 'service' was an 8AM to 8PM home imprisonment on Tuesday, when I finally became fed up with the channels not working. The tech arrived at 8:40PM without a call. He then declared the problem was at the street, but that, as a service provider, was unauthorized to fix it. He said his supervisor would have to also check on what HE found and then start a work order. They say the work was done yesterday. Last night there was no change to the missing channels. Today I called again. Again they will send a tech and I must be home, only this time from 3 to 5PM. At least the window is smaller.

We have had numerous tech visits. At their behest I have had THREE routers. The last time they wanted me to do this again but I refused. The tech then found out it wasn't the router (was it ever?), replaced the modem they supply, ran new cable to the street, and dropped the signal level.

Reading through posts on forums we are not alone. It seems even if you get a span of time with proper service, after a month or so, something happens and you lose the stability.

When you call you get a machine. If you can get a person they speak poor English until you somehow convince them to escalate it up the chain. There are long periods after "I'll connect you," where the music on hold repeats every 45 seconds or so. Then they announce the call may be recorded for quality assurance. I'll bet MY calls are used to train people in how to handle an irate customer. Handle, yes. Help, no.

DIET! DIET! DIET!

2010-04-06T13:11:00.002-05:00

I have never dieted. Back in the day I could almost will myself to lose a few pounds. Or maybe I convinced myself I did, when I didn't. It was a long time ago.

A few months ago I almost cut off a couple toes with the lawnmower. No, not to lose weight. But I DID lose a bunch through hospitalization and recovery. Maybe it was the pills that took away my appetite. I was on THREE gut-bomb antibiotics at one point - and they were VERY unpleasant.

Well, surprise, surprise... the weight came back.

I could still fit into my clothes, but I didn't like the way I looked. A roll of fat surrounded my waist. So I thought I'd cut out my evening sweets, do only light lunch, and be sure I walked a mile and change every day (not far, but, hey, my foot was sensitive!)

I gave it four weeks.

I refuse to step on a scale. It would demotivate me if there was only a little change. I may have given up sweets, but not impatience.

After 4 weeks, I'd take stock of what changes I noted.

Each evening I gave myself two Hershey Kisses and a couple Good and Plentys or a hard candy or two. I need the sweet, but not the pint of ice cream.

Week one was bad.

After a while I found some strength in not wanting to negate the denial I had endured to that point.

Some progress at 4 weeks. I decided to go for 4 more, which end this Sunday.

It worked. And when I resume, I plan to be much more discriminating. If it isn't GREAT, I won't eat it. Before I'd gobble.

I see and feel a difference. I will be better at choosing what I scarf. I wouldn't want to go through this again.

ANOTHER TOILET PROBLEM - FLUSH WITH CASH

2010-03-30T09:48:00.002-05:00

This is the second time. The good news is I believe THIS TIME we have a trustworthy, skillful, knowledgeable plumber. I say THIS TIME because the man cited three reasons why we will have to replace the wooden floor in the powder room AGAIN, i.e.: it wasn't repaired correctly the first time.

I won't detail the issues since I don't know the names of the parts involved. Just know that every flush was sending a spurt of water through a hole into the floor.

If you've never seen YOUR wooden floors ripped up due to water damage, let me tell you it's quite the deal - although when done properly, there's no permanent damage - just to your wallet!

First you have the toilet removed.
Then the floor removed.
Then you be sure it's bone dry.
Then the floor guy puts in a new floor.
Then the plumber reinstalls the toilet.

UH OH! COMPUTER MAKING NEW NOISES

2010-03-24T10:03:00.002-05:00

It sounds like a whirling, louder than ever. I think it's the fan, or worse, the hard drive. The fan has been cleaned relatively recently. The hard drive is not the original one, but a replacement somewhere along the lifeline of the box, as the original one became corrupt like a politician. At least it issued no denials.

If you are a friend and you lose track of me for a few days or weeks, the box did die and the replacement will bring with it many issues to resolve. I THINK I have saved on an outboard drive my email addresses but I can't be sure they will import into a new box when and if.

The other day my computer just shut DOWN in the middle of my typing... odd thing is that locally someone cut through a cable which took down all phone and internet for a while. And Terri's computer also died at work, another 'never before' thing.

Viruses are constantly checked on my computer... so I doubt that's an issue.

Just - stay in touch if I go away... I'll be back.

BLUE ROCK ARTIST RANCH

2010-03-22T17:28:00.007-05:00

Great name, huh? The place is a secluded recording facility outside of Wimberly, Texas, about 35 miles down the road from our house.

As a past attendee at one of their in-house concerts, I was invited to their 4th birthday party.

The day included performances (which are also recorded and shot on HD video, with feeds around the house. Ranch. Sorry.

Ruth Moody

Natalia Zuckerman

The Legendary Rupert Neve
Virtually every artist has recorded through his equipment which is in great studios all over the world!

The piano room (setup to record ensembles and groups)

The recording part of it all.

DAVY CROCKETT

2010-03-19T12:37:00.004-05:00

I don't remember having a coon-skin hat as a kid. But I had the 45rpm record... "Born on a mountaintop in Tennessee... Kilt him a ba'ar when he was only three..." I probably thought I was Davy once in a while, roaming the wilds of the neighborhood which weren't wild at all - you had to go into the 'woods' (no relation) to find 'wilderness.' The woods were really the grounds of Haverford College, which had trees of many species all through its square-mile campus, just two blocks from my house.

I didn't realize how much I missed Davy, until I saw the news story last night which included some clips from way back then, as they stirred some soul-memory long forgotten. That was a time of clear right versus clear wrong. Things were fresh, probably due to my age and the innocence of inexperience. And simpler. I remember that right always won.

Last night they showed Fess Parker - Davy - and also later, Daniel - at 85. He had done real well. Bought land and had an award winning winery on 2200 acres. Even at that age he looked like a real man and a guy who'd treat you right.

He starred in Old Yeller, the first movie I cried at. Didn't expect to, either. Just LOST it.

Whatever reality is, when I looked at Davy, or Fess, I saw a purity (real or imagined) which is long gone in the days of Tiger, Jesse James, John Edwards, partisanship, Enron, Madoff, steroided athletes.

Rest in Peace, King Of The Wild Frontier.

Who would quailfy as a Real Man today?

SXSW

2010-03-12T12:29:00.005-06:00

This is a BIG deal - SOUTH BY SOUTHWEST - coming to town in various incarnations - Film, Interactive, Music. The city will be full of gigs (last year over 1000 bands showed up from all over the world!) and parties. Celebs say this town is a cool place to be - that the folks don't rush to get an autograph or picture. That's a good thing. Likely true.

From SXSW.com: "The music event has grown from 700 registrants in 1987 to nearly 12,000 registrants. As Austin has grown and diversified, film companies and high-tech companies have played a major role in the Austin and the Texas economies. In 1994, SXSW added a film and interactive component to accommodate these growth industries. SXSW Film and SXSW Interactive events attract approximately 17,000 registrants to Austin every March.

SXSW's original goal was to create an event that would act as a tool for creative people and the companies they work with to develop their careers, to bring together people from a wide area to meet and share ideas. That continues to be the goal today whether it is music, film or the internet. And Austin continues to be the perfect location."

The Goody Bag thing:

One of the neat things about Austin is the shared pride people have ABOUT Austin - sure, some oldtimers complain about what was lost while the city expanded, but the cool vibe is still here.

A friend who was recently on a job interview in Dallas commented about how much more cosmopolitan Dallas is, compared to Austin. So true.

Austin is friendly, accepting, and music-centric.

For us, the perfect choice!

EVEN MORE TV: THE ACADEMY AWARDS SHOW

2010-03-08T09:03:00.004-06:00

I didn't care who won. Watched because it's more or less a tradition. Wondered if they could ever get the show into a format worth watching. Spoiler alert: NO!

HOWEVER, Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin were VERY VERY funny - or their lines were and they delivered most of them wonderfully. Something like this: Alec: "...a writer, musician, author, a Grammy and Oscar winner... STEVE MARTIN." Steve: (after applause, "And Alec Baldwin." Banter which was Best I Can Remember.

But the rest of the 'show' and the pacing were HORRIBLE.

They'd bring a group of people on stage then shoot them from a distant side angle. Huh? Rehearsals? In fact, immediately after a needless N.P. Harris song and dance that fizzle-opened, there were a few moments where the production seemed to go off the rails entirely, as the cameras didn't seem to know where to go or what to do and there was a major pause - this while you might be trying to snag 'sampling' viewers. Rehearsals?

THANK GOD for TiVo, although we kept catching up to real time via bypassing the dancing and many many boring awards and speeches from people who we don't care to see. What an ordeal!

I could go on and on but you get the idea. MOSTLY boring. Steve and Alec great.

Addendum: Just read local paper review. He came down hard on Alec and Steve. I don't agree. At all. Isn't that what makes horserace betting?

AND MORE TV: WEEDS

2010-03-07T12:57:00.007-06:00

Last night Terri and I watched the start of disc two of season 5 (episodes 8 and 9, I think.) After each one, we gave each other a look of "was that as good as I think it was?" It WAS.

Certainly this show will offend some conservatives. Yes it will. It's sometimes racy - language is real but also blue. This ain't no basic cable. And there's weed - smoking! And sales. And 'adult-situations' like sex and talk of sex. Actually a lot of that, though not graphic. Some nudity.

Again, the writing is great, the situations mostly great, the acting outstanding. It's funny, touching, sweet, tart, all at once. And Mary Louise Parker is incredible.

TV TALK

2010-03-05T17:32:00.003-06:00

Terri has pretty much checked out of LOST. I am hanging in hopefully, but so far, I feel unrewarded.

Watched the first LENO back at 10:35. I don't like him but he was obviously humping hard and it served him well to show that much energy and crispness.

I am WAY into THE GOOD WIFE. Again, Terri's not raving, but it is a terrific drama with good writing, great acting - maybe the classiest show on TV.

Returning some interest into Grey's Anatomy which surprises me. I could become numb at any time, but not so far.

The new show with Timothy Olyphant, looks GREAT and as soon as TiVo decides we are close enough, I will instruct the recorder to grab it for me.

DAMAGES is still fun, but I miss Danson - he was a great Villain. And HEY - there was Tony Soprano's uncle!!!

We have been binging on (the show) WEEDS and continue to be entranced by Mary Louise Parker. I strongly believe no other actress could hold that role!

HOUSE had some of it's best-ever episodes before the break. I hope they come back at that level.

FRINGE should decide what it wants to be. Bring on the Matrix stuff then. Enough worms-for-arms freaks. Zero chemistry from the two leads, though...

unlike CASTLE which brings forth a charm school run by Nathan Fillion. The banter reminds me of Bruce Willis and Cybil Shepherd on Moonlighting, back in the days of innocence and incense.

Checked out CBS and ABC news under Katy C and Diane Sawyer. I tend to watch NBC and prefer it and its team. But both CBS and ABC seemed good too, and the anchors pro.

Olympics - several of the announce staff seem long in the tooth and the NBC side seemed to lack - what - spirit? NICE produced pieces, though. Work to be proud of.

Loved the arena announcer at the large venue. Great voice. Great "read" and perfect for PA system - ie: great midrange - very clear - and enthusiastic! He had great personality without ever saying anything other than names.

Almost forgot IDOL. Weak. They have enough goodness for finals though. The 'panel' has been giving conflicting advice: "change a song and make it your way" - "just sing a song simply..." I don't think Ellen is adding the spark they hoped for - she COULD but must feel held back. Kara is trying hard to do the touchy-feely stuff with Simon, who I have to say I pretty much agree with so far. Randy should come back as a dawg. He'll lick you if he likes ya, but he won't go far if he doesn't. In other words - the panel o' judges need more personality other than that of the Next-year-I'm-GONE Simon C.

ANNUAL WEED WAR

2010-03-04T14:53:00.003-06:00

We've had a rainy winter. And cool. This is because some people off the coast of San Diego swim around in circles, which causes weather here.

It's actually hot in the sun today, so that will tell out-of-towners what it's doing here. I think our last cool day is gone as the sun is hot and the breeze, even when cool, has a hard time keeping things mild.

Weeds have birthed a week or weeks ahead of the grass. I read about the green way to kill weeds, vinegar and liquid soap, Dutifully I bought a new sprayer, lots of Aunt-Sally's-Vinegar-By-The-Gallon, and went to war.

Trouble is, the weeds have a big army. On an acre and a half that's a LOT of vinegar! I am pretty sure that zombie versions of the original kills are rising from their tombs, sewing seed, shooting runners, and wreaking havoc otherwise.

Even the rabbits cannot keep up. Nor the deer. We have an acre of rabbit and deer poop for sale (see the sign down by the road - bring your own container) but all those hungry tick carriers can't keep up with the damn dandelions!

I've tried pulling them. I tried, one year, the wholly holistic way, spreading compost all over everything ("a healthy lawn will take care of itself" "weeds signal something is wrong and you need to buy something.")

Bottom line: nothing works. As Terri says, at least they're green.

WHEN RADIO WAS FUN

2010-02-24T16:02:00.003-06:00

I was there.

I've found and put up for you to hear some of the fun that was the creed at BOB 100 FM in Minneapolis 1993-1997 or so.

Back then there was more opportunity to build what some called a "Stationality" - the personality of the station.

I was hired to get this brand new station on the air. When I began there was no staff, no studio - nothing - and this was no cookie cutter, though we did have the counsel of wise people like Jaye Albright and even, originally, Randy Michaels.

We did it right. We did it right on the air and we did it right with really good marketing and contesting. We had the world's Best Ever slogan: TURN YOUR KNOB TO BOB. Soon after we launched, if you said BOB somebody might well answer, "Turn your knob to BOB." We ran really good TV.

We had only the best billboards and they were all what you'd call "lit supers."
The Billboard said Turn Your Knob To Bob

Anyway, this might make you smile. CLICK HERE!

SNOWJOB

2010-02-24T15:54:00.002-06:00

Yesterday we had snow. Big flakes. Second-highest accumulation in 19 years. AN INCH.

The local TV stations had people out reporting on wet roads. Oooooo. TEAM COVERAGE of wet roads since there was nothing to talk about. IT MELTED.

All they could do is point to freezing overnight and wring their reporter-hands.

Today it's 50+, there's a refugee patch of snow hiding in the mulch, fighting its genetic predisposition to wet itself.

AUSTIN: LIVE MUSIC CAPITAL

2010-02-21T13:10:00.002-06:00

How cool to sit about 40 feet away from multi-grammy award winner Ray Benson in a local bar (owned by Willie Nelson's former now-deceased road manager) and enjoy the music and friendliness. We asked a woman if she was saving the whole table she and her guy were sitting at and she graciously welcomed us to sit with them.

We'll be back.

LOVE AUSTIN!

Photo via phone.

TIGER WOODS (NO RELATION)

2010-02-20T11:42:00.003-06:00

I suppose he had to say what he did. Cynics and critics are saying 'it was all staged.' Well, yeah. What did you expect?

What interests me is how little I care. I wonder why? I admit a general interest to see how these "Mea Culpa" moments are "handled." Even with that professional curiousity, I just cannot crank much enthusiasm for Tiger - I simply don't care.

I sure don't know about these things personally, but, after seeing the photos of his mistresses, with maybe two exceptions, I would have thought he could do much better.

Mom, trying to be supportive, said 'he didn't do anything illegal...' well, nice, Mrs. Woods, but just sit down please.

Anybody see any similarities between M. Jackson and Tiger? (Controlling parent, major talent, lost youth...?)

5 YEARS IN, WHEN WARRANTIES EXPIRE

2010-02-16T08:39:00.004-06:00

Or maybe they go away sooner - whatever the case, we seem to have hit the timeline when our house is requiring attention to appliances and minor this or thats which must be fixed for us to live a sane life. Example: one of the three zone heaters has begun to groan.

Today is a double whammy - I will be trapped in the office by the cleaning crew who have been absent a month, due to their cycle and our vacation timing.

And the appliance guy is scheduled to be back. I can write here that I think he's a talky know-it-all. He authorized a replacement under warranty for the refrigerator compressor without even knowing that was the problem (and we since found out, it wasn't.)

Whining?

Yes, I am.

This guy, in my non-professional opinion, has issues. And he's the boss of the repair service. Today he will 'repair' the dish washer and the outdoor grill. I feel compelled to keep a close eye on him as I don't entirely trust him. That means I must endure his boasts. Successful repairs or not, we won't be calling on him again. You might well ask WHY we let him back this time - simple - he's got the parts we need and we don't want to go through the process from the start again.

Update ++++

The guy wasn't quite as unsufferable as I expected, but still... example - I brought out the vaccuum cleaner 'Do yourself a favor and get rid of that right away...'

The outdoor grille, which he complained about and complained about (poorly made, bad angles for installing burners, etc. - was actually a quick and easy fix.

The dishwasher is luder than ever (and the issue was noise.)

The refrigerator is marginally noisier.

I seriously doubt either of these could be fixed beyond what has happened. Might have to replace the dishwasher eventually as it's annoying.

Meanwhile, the igniter on the built-in stove has gone out on one side ('need a new module,' and it's in the back, and due to the ducting, piping, etc, estimated at about $400-500!!!

BACK TO... winter?

2010-02-11T15:15:00.002-06:00

Don't know what the temperatures were last week in the Dutch West Indies, other than 'perfect.'

Back home now, it's another El Nino day - wet and cool... hovering around 41 degrees (average at this time of the year is a high of 64.)

We have shivered while watching the snow in the north and northeast. Thankyewverymuch but our dues are PAID IN FULL. Our two years in Syracuse topped all with yearly record totals of 176 and 192 inches. Add in Minneapolis, Buffalo, Montreal, etc., we are done with snow.

SUPERBOWL ADS

2010-02-08T09:36:00.002-06:00

After the jet lag works off - still feel it today - I thought I'd post some details of our trip to St. Martin, But for now - the highly anticipated Superbowl ads, reviewed by our panel of me.

I loved the Doritos ad where the dog slips his anti-bark collar on the guy who was teasing him, then barks. It was simple, cleanly executed, and very funny.

The Google ad was extremely clever and creative, telling a story through searches. Well done. Again, clear, and all this in a complete demonstration of how the service works. A+

Letterman and Leno with Oprah: wonderful. Taking full advantage of the buzz surrounding both L and L, the ad could have been for any of the three. Again, simple, clever and funny.

Of course there were many which were clever, though some lost their message in the intricacy or the gag.

Motorola's Megan Fox (bathtub) was very funny, though I thought it lost a little PRODUCT focus. But funny. I loved the guy up the ladder asking his buddy if he was stabilizing the bottom all the while the bud was watching the phone video, and the ladder goes down.

COKE's sleepwalker was great.

Hyundai's TEN YEARS ad with Brett Farve - great!

Hotel Hell was ok. The LONG VERSION (about 14 minutes.) The :30 renewed our love for the Griswolds, but not much else. Little sponsor memorability.

I've never liked the hint of porn on the GoDaddy spots (though they probably DO drive countless geeks to the website which is the point.) They just seem cheesy, not even sexy.

TruTV (groundhog) - honorable mention.

And there was one more I loved, but cannot remember it today which disqualifies it. I remember saying "this is VERY well done." But gone today. Hey, what's a couple million dollars wasted?

LEAVIN... ON A JET PLANE

2010-01-29T14:34:00.009-06:00

St. Martin, the patron saint of... ?

Join us, if you are looking for a quick escape:

Cockpit View of Landing at St. Maarten | Viral/Other | SPIKE.com

This is SO cool a place it's got two dictatorships, I mean municipal principals. Half is St. Martin, and the other half St. Maarten. One side wears no underwear. The other favors hats and bow ties.

Here's the landing from the beach. WORTHY!!"

Didn't you enjoy those 32 seconds? You did. Absolutely.

So you see that tomorrow we'll sand blast some sun worshippers who go for a little peace and quiet, a little getaway, AT THE END OF A RUNWAY.

We go directly to the boat, a 45-50 foot catamaran. It doesn't expand, it's I'm not sure how long it is. Pretty much a fait acomplii by now anyway.

We learn that in addition to the captain and cook, there will be a couple from Italy and a couple from Canada. They will be the palest.

There ARE sunny and warm areas of Canada, but they are in Florida.

I think we spend nite one in the harbor or mooring, since we board only an hour and a half or so before sunset. Sailboats sail. They are not fast. To get somewhere, maybe, but we'll see, and after travel for pretty much 12 hours, it won't matter.

I will take many pictures and should get into flickr or some place, so I can broaden it from the several I'd post here, huh?

I'm a computer guy but not to taking one along, so that's it for now.

SHOOTING GULLS

2010-01-25T16:58:00.003-06:00

More photography. Went to Lake Buchanen Saturday to meetup with the photo group I belong to... it turned out to be windy and eventually rainy, and the promoted eagles were nesting elsewhere. We did have some gulls follow the boat and believe me, it's not easy to get a good shot of a moving bird while on a moving boat.

Next week we'll be somewhere warm, on another moving boat...

PHOTOGRAPHER BOB WOOD

2010-01-20T14:09:00.009-06:00

I am enjoying the creative freedom photography has brought back to me as I believe that there's no bad thing as a bad photo if it resonates with you.

As a young official photoguy for our family (comprised of my mother, my father, and me) I travelled all over Europe, snapping pictures/slides from the top of the Eiffel Tower, to Picadilly Circus, to the Collesium. Venice, the alps. Really good pictures. My mother threw them out without telling me when she moved to Florida.

The DSLR experience is so cheap, easy, and rewarding. I write those words in that order because without the cheap and easy, I'd not go for the freedom it takes to take a lot of pictures, even of the same thing - each expanding my knowledge of what works. Being able to shoot free means your own subjective opinion will always be right for that picture, for you.

I've got pictures I have saved just to think about, to try to figure out what I really like - what is vibrating for me?

Usually I like it when a picture tells a story. There's an action captured, leading to an outcome (the diver is about to kiss the water/ the child is about to get the ice cream/ or an attitude (I am eating this ice cream and don't care how much gets on me/ love/ fun. The vitality of the characters photographed fuels the picture.

I shot 35mm for years, then 110 black and white in a twin-lens relex as a teen on the yearbook staff, back to 35mm, then video in virtually every format up until HDTV. I shot tons I HAVE NEVER SEEN. And don't really want to. Got back into semi-pro 35MM, then DSLR.

But good pictures really do hold up, grabbing powerful memories or emotions, right out of thin air.

I have a picture I took of our small cruise ship in Tahiti, docked so simply and peacefully. It has innocense about it. Two weeks later, the ship caught fire and was scuttled. This was a print and if I get a satifactory scan of it, will post below. I love how it feels.

I feel compelled to point to the right side top of the blog here with a link to more photos.

CONAN IS BEING SCREWED!

2010-01-12T14:59:00.002-06:00

It seems wrong, wrong, wrong to me that NBC wants to put LENO back following the 11P E/10P C news and have CONAN's THE TONIGHT SHOW after it at 12:05AM. Apparently CONAN isn't ready to go along.

If you think that - "Well, with all HIS money, how tough is life?" that's just not the point. It takes tremendous drive and talent to get as far as CONAN has - and while he might not be everyone's favorite, cutting him off at the knees is just wrong. It should take time to build his audience.

I blame NBC for being stupid. I blame Jay Leno for his eagerness to shuffle out of the cesspool of his current show and back to a later time slot, no matter what that does to his 'successor.'. Time to step out, Jay. Drive your cars. Do standup. You had your shot. It's over.

Same with Dick Clark, but a totally different story: time to step away.

I CAN FLY!!!

2010-01-12T14:57:00.005-06:00

Well, I did fly back in the 70s and 80s. If you want to see me and a buddy doing Ultralights, here's the place!"

CLOSE CALL?

2010-01-10T11:30:00.004-06:00

I was eating Raisinettes while getting dressed. I had lucked into the local store brand and they were fresh and good. The raisins were fat and there were some clumps of more than one raisin, covered in remarkably good chocolate.

I'm still a little slow getting my pants on, due to my accident affecting the left foot and a knee that is acting up on my right leg. As I pulled them on, I also had a fist full of Raisinettes, and I thought I lost one of the clumps into a pant leg, but couldn't be sure. Shook them out, but no raisin. Maybe I imagined it.

Here's what could have happened:

Now, later, I am at the physical therapy place. I remove my shoe to expose my foot and in the process, in front of the therapist, that lost chocolate-covered clump of raisinettes falls out of my pants. The therapist gives me a look that is PURE GROSS-OUT, because she thinks "not raisinette." Realizing what she's thinking, I try for a graceful recovery, only to discover there is no escape...

BRING BACK THE DEAD

2010-01-08T13:28:00.002-06:00

If someone famous but dead could still be alive today, at the age he or she would be, who would be the best or most interesting choice?

Would Elvis be doing commercials for Weight Loss? He'd be 75.

Would John F. Kennedy be an elder statesman, or just elder? He'd be 93.

Of course we miss many people, but perhaps idealize them the way they were, especially if they passed at the height of their prominence.

I think John Lennon would have aged gracefully, would still be not only cracking wise, but being so. He'd be 70.

Who would you choose?

NO MORE WWW

2010-01-05T12:50:00.002-06:00

I missed the change - and apparently, according to a friend who lives on his computer, by a year or so... you don't have to preface web addresses with a "www." I am so used to it, I do so automatically, but HAVE tried without and son-of-a-gun, it works.

Another tiny step forward.

FLOMAX AIRLINES

2010-01-01T11:34:00.004-06:00

With the new rules and restrictions placed by the TSA on flights and passengers, especially the "stay seated one hour before landing," there's a huge opportunity for another niche airline - one with pre-pre-screened travelers who might be allowed to potty due to their advanced age.

Heck, I don't care if you put a camera in the bathroom. When ya gotta go, you gotta go! I have been on some flights where they make you sit for way too long due to brief turbulence - actually, I think they make you sit initially, then forget to tell you it's "safe" to walk about the cabin.

And so you hold it and hold it and then your plane lands and taxis to the farthest gate which it turns out isn't ready yet because there's another plane in it and so you sit and sit and then they slowly tug that plane out of the way and your plane slowly moves up - you are in seat 20d and the travelling feebs all stand at once but then the flight attendants loudly remind everyone "we haven't docked at the gate and to be re-seated" and then we eventually do dock "DING!" and then all jump up to be cramped in the aisles grabbing luggage and then we wait again because the gate attendant hasn't moved the Jetway yet and then when that dude gets back from his break and they crack the door, the feebs shuffle oh-so-slowly. Meanwhile my kidneys are, shall I say, "unforgiving?"

I appreciate the need for advanced security, but... "when ya gotta go ya gotta go."

Oh - and to the people who complain about the new generation of scanners invading their privacy? I say: "TAKE A BUS."

XM AND ME

2009-12-27T14:36:00.003-06:00

Once there were two satellite companies: XM and Sirius. Despite blowing through mega millions, possibly billions, they never really caught on. (Recently they merged.) This is to say that the audience of all of the Sat channels added together at any minute don't equal one NYC radio station at that same minute.

My car 'came' with a free satellite radio trial. I had to check it out. WEAK program choices, weak talent, weak imaging, poor fidelity, too many bad songs! What's the point? And you have to PAY for this?

One sidebar: the traffic in real time was helpful, or would be, if I drove more distance. Apparently the traffic reports are overlaid on the navigation map. That's cool. But I wouldn't pay for it.

There are WAY too many ROCK channels, too many RAP channels, too many TALK channels, and not nearly enough music niching. (Maybe they know how few listen.) Even so, seems there are several mainstream formats completely ignored.)

For some reason I haven't been able to fathom, the radio comes on when the car starts even though I don't want it to, and have attempted various smooth moves to defeat it. To this moment, though, the radio is winning.

However, once on, I can turn it off, and sometimes do. But the other night, while driving to a birthday dinner (mine, not the car's and certainly not XM's), with the radio off, all of a sudden there was what sounded like an electronic sneeze. "Was that you?" I asked Terri. "Not me," she said. The mystery faded into the "things you can't figure out" cloud that follows life around.

I did notice WEATHER/EMERGENCY on one of the several electro-readouts. And snow was indeed blowing blizzard conditions, but far, far north of us. I let it pass.

The next day, When I got into the car and started it, there was (finally) no radio - but there was a message on the screen... if you wish to subscribe, call this number. AHHH. The 'sneeze' was the wet goodbye.

GOODBYE XM. Goodbye, what I term, the Big Satellite Scam.

CHRISTMAS MEMORIES

2009-12-22T10:04:00.003-06:00

...the smell of felt (green felt) which was tacked to the plywood upon which my Lionel railroad circled the tree.

... the artifically lonesome sound of the fake train whistle.

... the smell of tablet-in-the-smokestack "smoke" from the steam engine circling the tree.

... hearing "Santa" curse as he'd apparently shock himself 'wiring' Plasticville lights on the plywood.

... running my trains way too fast for the curves...

... getting a second engine, a Santa Fe diesel.

... egg nog - kinda like ice cream melt, sorta.

... family smells: turkey cooking, after shave, whiskey, pine, the whatever-it-is, it's uniquely grandma.

THE CHRISTMAS LETTER

2009-12-19T13:44:00.002-06:00

My annual Christmas letter has been mailed to those for whom we had addresses, and has arrived in San Diego and Los Angeles, in Maine, and Detroit, so it's out. This brings me to posting here in case you want to see it and aren't on the list, which, by the way, has little to do with if you have been naught or nice.

CHRISTMAS LETTER 2009
Lest we forget, the whole rationale for this letter is to spoof other letters. I have to find spoofage, so forgive me if I go dumpster diving.

The latter part of the year brought some excitement as I fell while mowing grass and mowed my toes. After surgery, they are still attached. Thankfully, Terri has hidden the hospital bills from me. I write this at T (toes) minus-7 weeks and am still sporting metal pins sticking from two toes. You can empathize – just shove a stapler into your sandal. Or maybe some Christmas Tree ball hook hangers in your socks. Terri’s car was also hospitalized in an unrelated series of mechanical breakdowns. It is now whereabouts unknown since we traded it in just as soon as it stopped smoking. At almost the same time (and actually planned) I too got a new car which I now use for physics experiments because no matter where I park it, it seems to magnetically attract other cars driven by people enjoying a meal at the wheel while on cell phone. Both cars are smarter than we are. Together there are over 600 pages of owners’ manuals. Driving mine home from the dealer just this week, I thought the navigation voice was going to throw a lit cigarette lighter onto my lap since I disobeyed the instruction. “Turn left. Turn left. Turn left NOW. Make a U-turn, then a U-turn. Make a U-turn and a U-turn NOW. NOW!” Both of us have already endured the misery of Our First Squashed Bug On The Windshield. Each bug was carrying a nasty and large depreciation notice. Neither car requires the key to start it – you just need to have it in your pocket. That seems like a convenience but every time you go near the car you start to fumble in the air for the phantom key. It feels wrong. Yes you can USE the key but why? The car senses you. It adjusts everything the way you like it. You push a button and it starts. My car stores maintenance issues IN THE wireless KEY which isn’t even plugged in! Oh – and the cars ‘learn’ how you drive and adapt to it so they can disapprove later.

The voice navigation system and I had words. “Navigation on” beep “Navigation” “Cancel...” “Say State” “Cancel, No I don’t want... “Kansas” “I didn’t...” “City? Say City?” C’mon!” “Common, Kansas. Say street name” “HOLD ON” “Holdon Street. Say Number...” Plus I think it has an attitude. Kinda snotty, almost clipped, impatient – a female who would be played by Tilda Swinton. This is nothing like the nice British lady who spoke from Terri’s Jaguar nav. Her new nav sounds like she’s a cultured twenty something living with her rich parents in Shanghai after education at Oxford. When recording the prompts, she was wearing her hair down, cascading over the shoulders of her tight-fitting white blouse. And.... where was I just now?

Austin is growing, much like Minneapolis did while we were there. We can drive down almost any road and as we shout over the navigation system voice, can say, “that’s new, that’s new, that’s new!” The economy HAS affected Austin but surveys insist that the economy here is still vibrant. Happily, music still rules! It’s amazing how much good live music there is. We remain in a several year-long drought (which did impact the whistle-fest.) Recent rains have slaked the thirst of some of the plants and trees though the big lake remains about 20 feet below full. El Nino is supposed to bring us extra moisture this winter. Personally, I am certain that has nothing to do with it – our cars will make that happen. We expect it to rain mud.

Now that I have retired from pushing the lawnmower, you should see the guys we hired! They have an amazing mower the operator stands on - it goes very very fast and does ballet! moves – turning on a dime. Dancing With the Stars could have a spinoff: Dancing with the Standonit Mower. Or Line Dancing with Weedwackers.

People seem to comment on the critters we have had visit us – this year I got more aggressive as some beasts were digging up our shrubs. The tally: 3 Armadillos, 1 Raccoon, 1 cat. Just down the street a Bobcat was sighted; and yes, a rattlesnake of some size, said to have survived a Lexus SUV riding back and forth over it. You have to wonder what THEIR navigation system thought about that?

At this writing, Sarah Palin is just beginning her book tour. While she is starring in the Psycho shower scene with John McCain’s campaign wet staff, I saw McCain slather on some be-nice unguent and refer to her as a ‘good friend.’ Huh? He DID look like an old bald weasel when he said it. If she ever gets into real power I fear the rest of the world will drop us from their fantasy-world-government league.

This seems to have been the year when the whining and crying reached out and touched us all – the assault was everywhere. I saw John Stewart asking, “Why now?” He’s right. It came upon us, cresting like a Tsnunami – Obama, Healthcare, The Wars, H1N1 shots, the stimulus package – not the 24 hour Cialis – the other stimulus package. Here’s my take: I blame the media. If there was no publicity, a lot of this stuff would die on the vine. It’s like a mass frenzy of mob-thought (you know: the mob IQ drops, responsibility is lost in the cushion of numbers.) Maybe people are that frustrated. Hey, 665 MILLION people in India HAVE NO TOILETS. Look it up. That’s frustration. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if the U S of A could befriend millions of citizens of the world with toilet donations? Porcelain diplomacy! That’d be the ticket. Imagine Hillary in Rashanamanapour, making the first ceremonial squat! Villagers would claw through crowds, just to get to touch her polyester pant suit.

We could trade toilet paper for oil. Or, we could say, “Hey, wipe out that field of poppies and we’ll deliver a dozen spanking new construction toilets...”

I don’t want to bring down the tone of this letter, but the world is supposed to end in 2012. At least you won’t feel singled out. Personally, I don’t believe the gloom and doomers, or that the Mayans really meant their calendar to go on forever. But some do – I have a friend who lives on a boat who has stockpiled hundreds of cans of Dinty Moore and Chef Boy R Dee. He’s anticipating chaos. Better hope he doesn’t drop the can opener overboard.

Terri has dropped the whole Christmas Card choice and purchase on me. I am drawn to cards which are on both ends of any conceivable scale – I like the abstract ones but also the homey-glitter-in-the-snow-on-the-pines cards. Limping into the Hallmark store, though, is not so much a fave. I feel this is a world in which I don’t belong. It’s like Stepford – smiling sales people with strange eyes. Here’s a rack of talking ornaments. Here’s a box of Orna-Mints! Here’s a simulated crystal keepsake onto which you can have engraved the height of your child... each year’s growth can be placed at the approximate true height on your forever pre-lit tree with 400 poke your eye out branches. So know that this beautiful accompanying card was purchased with great care by a man holding his breath to avoid the potpourri and scented candle chemichristmas.

We wish you cheer and peace.

Bob and Terri Wood

www.big-texas-mortgages.com
www.woodsgoods.blogspot.com
www.bobwoodvoiceovers.com
www.photographerbobwood.com

IBUPROFEN WITHDRAWAL?

2009-12-13T15:58:00.001-06:00

Per the doc, I ran a two week course of Ibuprofen for pain management. Stopped last night. Holy Moly, the pain is back. I had no idea that stuff worked as well as it did!

CHRISTMAS CARDS

2009-12-08T09:36:00.003-06:00

This year I bought Hallmark Christmas cards. Nice, but probably overpriced - about a buck a piece. If someone could come up with an internet app for Christmas cards - and I know there are ecards out there but I mean a really good multi-card automated system, I think they'd make out like a bandit.

Please give me a piece of your new riches if you develop this idea.

Think of it - database management... no stamps... no cut tongues licking the darn envelopes.

BUYING CHRISTMAS CARDS

2009-12-01T12:46:00.004-06:00

I know there are so many other important things 'out there' in the real world - The White House party gatecrashers (or is it gatecasheriners?), Tiger Woods and his Holly Jolly Christmas (this just in - he thought the fire hydrant was a garden gnome and we know how evil THEY are...)

But my global reach extends only so far. Today I bought our new supply of Christmas cards. They were on sale, and the selection was surprisingly limited - this - on December First? I didn't want the smiling Santa Face which I later found (35 cards for $3) at the food market. Instead I chose a nice sort of abstract design that looked good to me and seemed to say SNOWFLAKE Christmas - an ideal image. We rarely get snow this far south, but it's fun to watch the cars in Dallas slide into one another in the snow. They run that video on local TV in a loop instead of the Yule Log.

And where do you get Christmas cards? At the local HALLMARK GOLD STORE OF LOVELY CRAP, of course. The store has a scent. The scent is designed to make you think warm thoughts of gramma, as she removes a freshly baked batch of gingerbread to go with her freshly whipped cream. This is to loosen your wallet. It apparently works as I got out with $97 worth (worth?) of cards, one of the few selections where I could get them all in the same design.

There are figurines which greet you from their holy altars of Shelves, record your own message cards (ah - tech!), cards for every incarnation of relationships: "Sure we're divorced but at this special time of the year I wish your tree tinsel gets caught in the vacuum cleaner you stole when we split our stuff up - there was NO court order on that - anyway I hope the tinsel jams the motor, starts a fire, and burns down my half of your damn house." Harsh, but admittedly seasonal.

Or:

"Psychologists say the holiday season is one full of depression. I was going to send you a more expensive card but on my way to the store I saw a rag-tag kid standing shivering in the snow in front of the coffee shop. So instead of buying you a better card, I treated myself to some hot chocolate, to cheer myself up."
Season Greetings.

Or:

"Why your card is not sealed: I found an online story of how some workers at the Hallmark glue factory had H1N1 flu and may have coughed into the vat of glue. So what would YOU do? Merry Fluless Christmas."

We've lost addresses over the travels and also some people have apparently removed us from cherished status to aw, let's just stop this back and forth once a year because we'll never see them again anyway and who cares - Bob is odd and his stupid Christmas letter... is just hard to follow.

Well, the letter is done, though Terri has to edit or scowl still. The cards are in house. The list has been printed. Now if you don't get one, it's because we haven't heard from you in a long time - the statute of card exchange limitations is two Christmases, I believe.

I will publish the Christmas letter for those who want to see what they missed, after all the cards have been sent and would have been received if the temp posties can find your address.

DOMESTIC MYSTERY

2009-11-29T10:41:00.002-06:00

Two flowerpot sit 40 feet from each other, flanking the pool. It's about 8 feet to the ground. One has several inches of water at the top of the pot, which has always easily drained in the past. The saucer is dry but it has a hole for water to escape, assuming it makes it to the bottom of the pot, which it always has.

The other pot is dry.

We don't think it rained. If it did, overnight, how did one pot get wet the other not? By the way, the seat cushions about 6 feet from the pot in question, are dry.

- Why one pot? Incidentally, both pots have identical soil.
- How?
- Cue the X files theme.

WIRELESS TOES

2009-11-25T11:02:00.002-06:00

You bet! No bluetooth here. Yesterday the doc removed the wires from my toes. The wires were longer in real life than in my imagination. Removal did not hurt - I don't know if the nerves nearby were lost in the accident or what, but I can write I am really happy they are GONE!!! Why? So I can begin the process of reverting to shoes.

Doc said I can expect some pain, and indeed I do. I can tell from the little pulses of discomfort which periodically have visited, that putting weight - after 8 weeks - on it and the surrounding tissue, blown out and healing bones, will hurt.

On the other hand, he pulled off the toenail and I didn't feel it. So clearly some nerves are there, some not. I was told 2 of 4 were left. I was also told this was one of the 'miracle' saves the doc has performed this year. I don't think he was bragging.

So literally, it's now the next step.

THE CHRISTMAS LETTER

2009-11-20T10:05:00.002-06:00

At Christmas I used to send out spoofs of things - KEEP THIS TICKET tickets, balloons, glitter - accompanied by stories I'd make up to justify the nonsense (like: The LEGEND OF THE LITTLE BALLOON BOY.) At some point this morphed into The Christmas Letter which was a spoof of the 'brag' or 'keeping in touch' letters you often receive from old friends at holiday time.

Terri tries to keep me in check. But I really want to loon out creatively. When I write about fake family members, she, or her sense of humor, asks for an edit.

This year, I am stumped. What I wrote so far is too typical.

What if Santa was a Vampire?

I know. Over the top. Sorry. Again.

NEW CAR

2009-11-12T11:53:00.003-06:00

BEFORE

I am just 20 minutes away from going to pickup my new car. No doubt pictures will follow... I am excited and it will be a pleasure to get out from under the 92,000 mile 'doubts' which, like a tiny oil leak, make me wonder what is ready to explode or fail.

Over the course of a car you get used to these things (that clicking in the dash that seems to be a shorted cycle/uncycle thing in the heating system) - that engine noise, the judder when backing up or turning sharply, the broken latch, the door you have to try to open twice. It adds up and stresses a bit. Under warranty and new, whatever it is, is fixed free and will not be ignored.

I have half-expected my AC to quit too - not an issue now that it's fall, but quite the deal (and EXPENSIVE) in the summer... why? Because it'd be so darn impossible to ignore!

So, in an hour I will be at the dealer and done with my ol' A6... it's been good to me and I'll miss it, sorta, but the NEW Supercharged A6 will endear itself, no doubt.

AFTER

Nice ride! There's a lot to get used to but I am already loving the Supercharged 300HP engine. It steps OUT and I really wanted that! Overall, the new A6 is comfortable and equipped (Prestige package) with almost anything I can think of. It doesn't have the radar that actually takes over if you are about to crash but I'm not ready for that degree of robot. This does have voice command, and that could be fun.

As I pulled out of the dealer's lot, my old car was sitting there looking kind of dumpy - I hadn't washed it - why? If a car could look forlorn, that's what I saw in my last glimpse. I don't name cars or anthropomorphize them, but it looked sad.

Now to attack that owner's manual.

YOU CAN'T WALTZ IN A PNEUMATIC BOOT

2009-11-10T10:07:00.002-06:00

With apologies to the late Roger Miller's YOU CAN'T ROLLERSKATE IN A BUFFALO HERD...

I am conflicted about today's doctor appointment. I hope he'll remove the wires from my toes. I hope it will not be a painful visit. I'm not sure those two thoughts can be reconciled.

Tomorrow marks the six week anniversary-? of my accident. Here's am update: with the boot on, I can walk around, drive, climb stairs. Without it on I can't do weight bearing, except on my heel. It's awkward. I feel trapped.

The toes look swollen. One wire is starting to move - and that's supposed to be a good sign of impending removal. The Big Toe wire, however, seems to be permanent.

I am eager to move away from this event. X-Rays today may tell the tale.

TIME WARP?

2009-11-07T07:59:00.002-06:00

UNRETOUCHED PHOTOS OF TIME HOLE EXPERIENCED IN AUSTIN!

I had a hankering. Terri also had one. There's a chain restaurant with the sweetest, best ribs I have ever had. And they have one here. It's called HOUSTON'S, but I've eaten at their places in Houston, Nashville, Los Angeles (Westwood) and now here.

I have been a judge at various ribfests, as part of my radio days. I figure I have sampled at least 30 rib vendors. Houstons wins hands down.

But the odd thing is they bring you the plate, and that's a mighty rack on it. Then, Snap! - the plate is empty and there's a hole in time which would have been where the food was eaten. It - just - happens.

IS IT ME?

2009-11-03T08:52:00.003-06:00

It could be me. Trauma has changed my perception, maybe? Or the weeks I sat imprisoned in that chair with my foot up gave me more media time than in a normal life. But I don't think that's it.

It seems to this observer of the scene that there's more whining, more overreaction, LOUDER reaction than before. How you define before is hard to pin down, but I'd qualify it as "recently."

Example: there were media reports of how so many parents were wary of and would avoid the H1N1 vaccine. Then, in the media's blink of an eye, there seemed to be grave concern about the supplies being inadequate. Every day you see lines of people awaiting their dose. CDC officials exclaiming it's in the pipeline.

It's as if the VOLUME has been turned up on public issues.

Afghanistan: the president is deciding. The president is taking too long. The no-election there has amped up the need for a quick decision.

What happened to carefully thought out decisions, weighing all sides of an argument? And often there IS no absolute right, just a best guess, a calculated risk. One to be set upon by the opposition.

To me, the screech is growing louder. It is disconcerting. It's unreasonable.

Let's not even consider the health care debate - although debate might be too non-partisan a word.

President Obama was initially seen as taking on too much, now taking on too little - waffling - indecisive - a rookie.

Has the opposition to anything become more media savvy? Has the media dumbed down?

CARS

2009-11-01T10:41:00.004-06:00

After 10 years of service, it seemed a good time to replace my car, a 1998 Audi A6. I test drove the 2009 version, but decided to await the 2010 version - said to be the same as the 2009, with less immediate depreciation. I ordered one.

I should write I feel I had to do all the work and push the dealership (Roger Beasley, here in Austin) into ordering one for me. That was - maybe 6 weeks ago.

Friday, a salesman called, "YOUR CAR IS HERE!" "When do you want to pick it up?" I said, well, Saturday afternoon. We had to get the check, etc. After a while he called back - "Oh, sorry, it's not your car. We thought it was, then uncovered it..." "Where's MINE?" "Probably at the port (of Houston)."

And that's the care you get for north of $50,000.

Terri's INFINITY purchase (the car, not unlimited time) has been so much smoother, and we expect to have it next week. They have held her hand through the process.

Her Jaguar is still in service. (Charles Maund Jaguar) seem to have different stories each call - and there have been a batch of them. They claim to have the parts, and suggest they'll be done in a few days. Their whole demeanor has been strange. We think they are perhaps responsible for the engine damage under repair, since their earlier repairs failed within miles. And they never came up with the new Jag they wanted to let her drive while hers was in service.

WHY HAS THE BLOGGING SLOWED?

2009-10-15T19:25:00.005-05:00

An accident has kept me from blogging lately, and likely will slow down what I have been doing, at least for the next month or so, although today is the second day back at the computer in over two weeks.

I was cutting the grass when I tripped over a rock while walking backwards - you know - you go forwards then backwards over some areas. As I went down on my back, the only thing I was holding was the handle of the lawn mower and I must have pulled it toward me. Over my foot.

I came very close to cutting off my toes.

So, long story short: 3 hour surgery, hospital, now home and long recovery. Maybe not long in the scheme of things, but at least another month to go. I am lucky that the surgeon saved my toes. They are still attached.

It's a day by day thing - believe me, getting back to the computer is a VERY big deal. I am going to blog the whole recovery period at once, when it's over, and am keeping myself busy with writing daily thoughts. Until yesterday, all via Blackberry. The notes give me the ability to get my mind off the long road ahead. As I heal I will gain energy and return to writing other things as they come into my life and thoughts. If you made it this far, thanks for hanging in!

THE ROOM WENT QUIET...

2009-09-28T16:35:00.004-05:00

I can't remember where I read a description of someone walking into a room, and just by their presence, the room went silent.

I have witnessed this three times.

ONE: A crowded bar in Pittsburgh. I worked at KQV Radio, where the executives (separated from and far above the mere mortals on the ground floor of the Chamber of Commerce Building) had a sexy secretary/assistant, who had some sort of sexual charisma. She was like Joan in Mad Men, but not as busty.

Rumor was she was a 'possession' of one of the group VPs in NYC.

I distinctly remember watching this young woman go to the rest room in the crowded bar in which I found myself, and telling my table companion that he was about to experience something unusual. When she emerged, the crowded, noisy room, suddenly went quiet. Not dead quiet but it was like an audio eclipse. Amazing.

TWO:
I befriended Louie, a new salesman at CJFM in Montreal, who, at the time (1975) looked a lot like Robert Redford in his Butch Cassidy days. We'd go to lunch when our schedules permitted. Into a crowded (packed!) Brasserie we'd stroll in downtown Montreal, and the place would drop into a hush as every woman with a view stopped talking. It was dramatic, and since it never happened to me alone, well, ahem. This was not a one-time thing, either.

THREE:
Nina, the then-wife of Robert Rich (Rich Products, then-Rich Stadium where the Buffalo Bills played) was an account exec at a local Buffalo Ad Agency which represented our radio stations, WBEN and ROCK 102. I was the product guy so we'd have meetings. One winter day I took her to lunch, (or maybe she took me - yeah - that's the ticket!) and, as this good looking blonde in a full length fox coat walked into the restaurant, the place went quiet. The eyes were upon us.

Her son played a young Robert Redford in the movie The Natural which was filmed in Buffalo. There's some degrees-of-separation thing going in this post.

Once, on a snowy night, while we had much liquor with dinner at a steak house on my birthday, I told Louie how much I envied him. His response, as was typical for Louie, came straight from the heart, and surprised me. He said, "I know how I look. But I envy YOU. Women see me and think my mind is as good as my looks. I envy YOU who can go on the air and know what to say." Point made, Louie.

CONTRACTIONS

2009-09-18T10:34:00.002-05:00

It seems as if many in the world have forgotten what the rules are for "it's" versus "its." I see errors in places where you'd have to figure they should know better. Ad copy. Newspaper stories. TV crawls.

"It's" is a contraction for IT IS. "Its" is a possessive, as in, "The dog chased its tail so many times there was a funnel in the floor where it used to go in circles."

I wonder about "It's" as a contraction for "it has." Maybe I was in the bathroom in school that day when Sister Mary Thorn-In-The-Crown Jesus Wore explained that one. It seems correct, as in, "It's been seven lonely years since the dust storm blew away my family."

Some contractions are pretenders: "I'm" for "I am" only saves one space. Who thought that up? It is hardly efficient. (You thought I'd use "it's," didn't you?)
"Couldn't" - another loser. Maybe it has to do with how people mumble? "That's" saves only one space. Stack those spaces up and you aren't going to hit the moon quickly, that's for sure.

In the same vein, there appear to be - by common usage - new rules. "CD's" meaning several of them, for instance. To me and the chain of Sisters Of Mercy authorized to feed my mind as a child, that's a POSSESSIVE case, as in "The CD's case was left on the floor where my foot found it and skated across the rug like Peggy Flemming in her day." But no, you see a flying apostrophe thrown after many words as if someone got a truckload wholesale, discovered they expire, and is trying to get them out of there before they stink up the place!

I am confused enough already.

LIVE FROM DARYL'S HOUSE

2009-09-17T12:14:00.005-05:00

What if you could get to hang with a favorite musician? What if you could hear him play in his own home? What if he had a musician-guest in, every time you visited - some known, some not yet, some just coming up? All good!

Well, if Daryl Hall is one of your favorites, you can do all of that above. Posted every month via email, is a link to the latest.

Performances are mixed with banter; usually some guest chef is in the kitchen cooking something you can almost smell and certainly want to taste.

Each episode is about 8 songs long.

Daryl appeals to me more from his NON-Hall and Oates side, but perhaps that's because he's a 'blue-eyed soul (meaning: white) singer' and is from the environs of Philadelphia, my home town. So is Todd Rundgren, in this latest performance, which I enjoyed so much.

It's free. It's fun. There have been 23 of these so far.

Here's the link. Enjoy the show!

JAY LENO SHOW

2009-09-15T08:46:00.007-05:00

I used to like Jay Leno. I've seen him live twice, but a long time ago, maybe 30 years for the first time, at Buffalo's Tralfamadore Cafe.

Since he took over the Tonight Show, not so much. I find his explanation of the jokes after the punchline irritating and pandering, showing either no confidence in the joke or the audience. He's much more likable showing off a car from his collection.

JAYWALKING is really People Are Funny spun one way. That's really old TV, People are ignorant, which I don't find funny, but worrisome. JAYWALKING wasn't part of the big premiere.

We tuned the new show last night, wanting to see how the retread would work. For me, it doesn't. The montage opening is weak and it rolls along familiar tracks afterwards, with a tad more haste.

But who's the fool here? How many tens of millions has Leno made so far? He was popular - is popular - works hard. Jay is not the fool.

I believe NBC will regret its decision to drop 5 hours of prime time for this discount-programming. That's the game - cut expenses/make money. A week of Leno costs less than ONE hour of episodic TV. The first day will rate highly from curiosity, the first week, too. Then the show will settle. NBC will call it success if they can turn a profit.

I won't watch.

After the less than overwhelming open, Jay comes out and shakes hands with audience members, then does jokes. There's a new set, but that opening format looks like his old show after-the-news to me. I watched enough to know I didn't like it - or would watch occasionally to catch a guest.

Last night had a LAME bit where Jay 'asked' President Obama questions which then showed answers from another interview. Har har.

Guest Jerry Seinfeld - still funny - should have been given more uninterrupted time. He 'brought on' Oprah via Video which was another waste of time (as Jay was unable to get a word in...) Har.

A comic then 'entertained' a car-wash patron, singing to her as she waited. Reportedly, there are other folks on board for more out-of-studio 'bits.'

Kanye West choked up trying to 'splain why he did what he did, interrupting that poor Taylor Swift at the MTV video music award show the night before. That was semi-poignant and semi-literate at the same time. Maybe if he rapped it, it would have worked? This was almost surreal, especially when he couldn't speak and Jay (wisely) let the silence extend. Instead of a hoople-head shouting at the President in an address to Congress and the nation, here's where a healthy "You Asshole!" from an audience member would have made impolite sense.

Rhianna, Jay-Z and Kanye then sang or rapped.

You could argue the new show hasn't found it's feet yet, but after 3 months to think stuff up, this was bland, bland, bland.

A bizzare thing intruded - we thought it was a schtick at first. We were watching on TiVo, about 5 to 10 minutes behind the real time timeline. At one point, the channel switched to an EMERGENCY NOTIFICATION on another channel, which crawled in English and Spanish across the top of the screen, announcing a child abduction in waters 20km from the coast... which is a couple hundred miles from here. It seems the emergency notification was really a combo of weather and Amber alert, with no real details. I've never seen TiVo hijacked before. Somebody pushed the wrong button at KXAN-TV. They also blew the news promo slot as their rehearsal or taping of it also just popped on in mid-Leno, then popped off. When it came time to run it, they didn't.

But wait: Others seem to share my opinion:

"The answer: No desk until the last five minutes. The question: What is the difference between the new 'Jay Leno Show' at 10 p.m. and the former 'Tonight Show with Jay Leno' at 11:35 p.m.?" -- The Gazette

"The menu of the new show is awfully familiar ... [and] an unsettled sense that they're throwing things on the wall to see what sticks." -- Hollywood Reporter

"Without Kanye West, and his conveniently timed controversy from the MTV Video Music Awards, NBC's 'Jay Leno Show' premiere Monday would have been even more of a cut-rate, snooze-inducing, rehashed bore. If Leno's desire is to help fans get to sleep earlier, desire satisfied" -- USA Today

"Leno's funny, but in the safest way. He's adheres to the center of the exact middle road, so it's wrong to expect a revolution here. He has all the draw of buy-one-get-one-free smoothies. His comedy is bubble-wrap; its appeal needs no explaining. He goes with Dan Brown novels and Marriott Rewards points and repeat viewings of the cinchy CBS crime procedurals he now finds himself programmed against: Who doesn't like all of those things?" -- Washington Post

"The first 'Jay Leno Show' was reminiscent of nothing so much as a typical 'Tonight Show with Jay Leno,' with ... [though] superstars were upstaged by what turned out, through pure dumb luck" -- Kansas City Star

"There isn't much difference between the new show and Jay's 'Tonight Show.' There's more comedy, though it's of the bland, topical variety that Jay is known for..." -- Newsweek

"NBC and Leno have delivered something pretty 'Tonight'-like ... they're giving old Jay fans what they like ... interspersed with enough of Whatever People are Talking About Today to get a churning drive-by audience" -- Time

"Exactly like we all should have known it would be ... If this is as good as it gets with three months to work on it, what's it going to be like once the night-after-night grind sets in? Or even more to the point, what's Jay going to do without a Kanye West moment every night?" -- Dallas Morning News

"It's not a good sign when the Bud Light commercial is funnier than the comedy show it interrupts ... his opening monologue seem[ed] like an attempt to cash in on the current vampire fixation -- comedy of the undead" -- LA Times

"The jokes felt familiar, the monologue, too. Someone, however, might want to alert Universal lot security: The couch was missing.Otherwise, what was so different between his last gig and this one, besides the hour?" -- Newsday

RAIN RAIN DON'T GO AWAY

2009-09-10T19:06:00.002-05:00

Something we haven't seen in QUITE a while - RAIN running down the window. It rained hard today. People away form this area cannot easily comprehend how low we are - the big lake, Lake Travis, is about 32 FEET below average.

The BOB Blog

JANUARY RANDOMNESS

CHRISTMAS 2011

TING TING A LING

SO WHAT HAVE I HEARD YOU ON?

A MAN AND HIS TOYS

COMING SOON

XMAS WISHES

DUNKING FOR APPLES

TOO LATE!

LIMIT THE ADS

POLITICS

ADVERTISING...

DEAR DIARY

FACEBOOK ISN'T TWITTER

WAITING

ROADRUNNER OR ROADKILL?

HYPE FEVER

THERE'S A KIND OF A HUSH ALL OVER THE WORLD

IPAD AND ME

THE ATOMIC GNAT

A BETTER MOUSETRAP?

THE VOICE OF...

THE CARPET CLEANER

BY NOW

THAT MICROPHONE IS LIVE

A BITE OF THE APPLE

MORE ADVENTURES IN THE COMPUTER

PLEASANT VALLEY SUNDAY

PLANE CRASHES INTO OUR OLD BACKYARD

IGNORANCE IS BLISS

CALIFORNIA

OUR HERO BUILDS A COMPUTER FROM SCRATCH

CHROME SWEET CHROME

2010 CHRISTMAS LETTER

FA LA LA LA snif LA **SNEEZE***

OLD COMPUTER NEW COMPUTER

ELECTRONICA

TESTING 1 2 3

CATCHING UP

POLITICS

COMPUNUTS

I BELIEVE.

PICNIC

THE SHORT LEASH

STUFF HAPPENS

KEYBOARD MEMORY

WILLIE'S 4th of July Picnic

FIREWORKS!

HPs NASTY SCHEME

TIME KEEPS ON SLIPPING INTO THE FUTURE

POOL VERSUS BOAT

SIXTEEN TONS

ENTERING THE NOW

TIME-WARNER IS RUN BY THE DEVIL

DIET! DIET! DIET!

ANOTHER TOILET PROBLEM - FLUSH WITH CASH

UH OH! COMPUTER MAKING NEW NOISES

BLUE ROCK ARTIST RANCH

DAVY CROCKETT

SXSW

EVEN MORE TV: THE ACADEMY AWARDS SHOW

AND MORE TV: WEEDS

TV TALK

ANNUAL WEED WAR

WHEN RADIO WAS FUN

SNOWJOB

AUSTIN: LIVE MUSIC CAPITAL

TIGER WOODS (NO RELATION)

5 YEARS IN, WHEN WARRANTIES EXPIRE

BACK TO... winter?

SUPERBOWL ADS

LEAVIN... ON A JET PLANE

SHOOTING GULLS

PHOTOGRAPHER BOB WOOD

CONAN IS BEING SCREWED!

I CAN FLY!!!

CLOSE CALL?

BRING BACK THE DEAD

NO MORE WWW

FA LA LA LA snif LA SNEEZE*